If Heavenly Father’s house is a house of order, if God organizes all the stars in heaven to follow precise orbits so that they might stand “for signs, and for seasons, and for days, and for years,”[i] if He forms every creation to exist delicately in a balanced ecosystem, if by design He places all truth and intelligence into specified spheres so that they might act for themselves[ii] —why would God leave the placement of his children to chance?

Of course, He does not. Countless ages of premortal obedience and righteous living determine our children’s mortal placement, which, beyond every other consideration, is meant to reward them and to magnify their opportunity to advance toward exaltation. Even the difficulties they experience can serve to save and exalt them.[iii]

Elder Neal A. Maxwell declared that the youth of Zion are living here and now by assignment. “These are your days!” he said. “You are in this time and circumstance by Divine appointment. God knows you and he knows what you have the capacity to achieve.”[iv] When our children slip into seasons of waywardness, we might better endure the challenges by remembering who they really are and why God has strategically placed them in our family.

Praying That She Will Remember

“Evelyn” in Michigan (name and location changed) wrote of her daughter:

“My husband and I knew that the child I was carrying was a special soul. Early in my pregnancy we began to have experiences with this child. Soon we perceived that a little girl was coming to us. And what a powerful person she was! When we would gather our children together for family prayer, our “little girl” would come and join us, too. Sometimes, we could actually point to the place where she was kneeling. On a few occasions, when we had Monday night activities for Family Home Evening, we perceived that she had come along. Although we had enjoyed special experiences with each of our children before they were born, we had never experienced anything like this.

“When our daughter was born she was the joy of our life, and she lived up to the powerful personality that we had previously experienced. Then, when she entered High School, she hit a crisis point. In a class, she was introduced to another element of friends, who had a profound affect on her. Without our knowing, she began to experiment with alcohol then marijuana. One thing led to another, sloppy appearance–sexual dalliance, more alcohol and drug experimentation–and soon she was spending less and less time with our family, and she abandoned the church altogether. Our hearts were shattered one night when we received a call from the police station that she had been picked up for driving under the influence.

“We do not know when this trial will end for us. We continue to love and encourage her, but we are settling in for what may be a long siege. Our peace lies in the fact that the Lord allowed us to experience early the power and importance of this child who was coming to our family. We know she is ours for a reason, and our responsibility for her is long-term. Our prayer is that our daughter might someday remember who she really is.”

Divine Appointment and Positioning

God, being all-knowing and anticipating every eventuality that would befall our children’s mortal experience, carefully positioned our children into selected families to provide them the best chance of nurture, repentance and exaltation. This is a critical piece of information for parents. Despite their feelings to the contrary, a child’s rebellion is not a parent’s failing but rather a parent’s calling.

When the child does turn back—and most of them will—they will begin to remember who they really are and resume their premortal work—the work of redemption–by gathering the living and the dead to Christ and disseminating the gospel blessings to them, much in the same way “the faithful…of this dispensation, when they depart from mortal life, continue their labors…in the great world of the spirits of the dead.”[v] The scriptural stories of the Apostle Paul, Alma and the Sons of Mosiah are given to us as universal models.

We must keep in mind that because our children were assigned to come forth in the last days, they are targets for the Adversary. We are clearly taught that children born in the Covenant in the last days have come to earth with the singular assignment to prepare the world for the Savior’s Second Coming. Therefore, our children, who are born or adopted into the lineage of Israel are “marked” for greatness because of their former greatness. President Ezra Taft Benson said,

In all ages prophets have looked down through the corridors of time to our day. Billions of the deceased and those yet to be born have their eyes on us. Make no mistake about it—this is a marked generation. There has never been more expected of the faithful in such a short period of time than there is of us. Never before on the face of this earth have the forces of evil and the forces of good been so well organized. Now is the great day of the devil’s power. But now is also the great day of the Lord’s power…. While our generation will be comparable in wickedness to the days of Noah, when the Lord cleansed the earth by flood, there is a major difference this time: God has saved for the final inning some of His stronger and most valiant children, who will help bear off the kingdom triumphantly.… You are the generation that must be prepared to meet your God….The final outcome is certain—the forces of righteousness will win.[vi]

An Amazing Promise Waiting for Fulfillment

Clearly, to be purposely and divinely placed at this crucial time and place, each of our children had to have proven exceedingly righteous. Joseph Smith revealed, “There is a time appointed for every man, according as his works shall be.”[vii] Paul explained that this “time appointed” would be especially true of the latter-day children of Israel; they would be specifically singled out and strategically placed because premortally they had “conformed to the image of [God’s] Son.”[viii]

Therefore, God took careful note of their potential to do good and deigned to position them in an era and circumstance that was best suited to their strengths and weaknesses. Elder Erastus Snow, explained that the premortal ministry of God’s “peculiar people,” destined them to assume important mortal callings in the Melchizedek and Aaronic Priesthoods:

For he has had his eye upon the chosen spirits that have come upon the earth in the various ages from the beginning of the world up to this time…The Lord has sent those noble spirits into the world to perform a special work, and appointed their times…and their future glory and exaltation is secured unto them; and that is what I understand by the doctrine of election spoken of by the Apostle Paul and other sacred writers: ‘For whom he did foreknow, he also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of His Son, that he might be the first-born among many brethren.’ Such were called and chosen and elected of God to perform a certain work at a certain time of the world’s history and in due time he fitted them for that work.[ix]

This is an amazing promise that should give parents of “elect” albeit wayward children cause to patiently persevere and hope that their children will yet remember who they are and rise to the stature of their premortal greatness.

The Noble and Great Ones

Pursuant to the perfect foreknowledge of God, our children were likely assigned family placement, birth time, location, and mortal opportunities according to their strengths and weaknesses. According to many sources, they were among the noble and great ones, who were shown to their forefather, Abraham.

Now the Lord had shown unto me, Abraham, the intelligences that were organized before the world was; and among all these there were many of the noble and great ones; And God saw these souls that they were good, and he stood in the midst of them, and he said: These I will make my rulers; for he stood among those that were spirits, and he saw that they were good.[x]

Speaking of our children’s premortal nobleness and greatness, President Spencer W. Kimball said to the youth, “The prophets in this dispensation have taught us that special spirits were reserved to come forth at this time in this last dispensation. You are among those very special spirits!”[xi]

If you have a wayward child, this may be hard to believe. You might ask, “Was my troubled child included in the prophet’s declaration?” Yes! Speaking to the youth of the Church, Elder H. Burke Peterson said, “My dear friends, you are a royal generation. You were preserved to come to the earth in this time for a special purpose. Not just a few of you, but all of you.”[xii]

The Noble and Great Ones will do the Work of Redemption

What was the premortal work that our children did so well that caused them to be distinguished above the majority of the hosts of heaven?

Redemption.

Redemption is not a work of God, it is the work of God, and therefore it is the preeminent work of all celestial beings—those who are or would be gods. Former Brigham Young University professor, M. Catherine Thomas, wrote:

Out of all of Heavenly Father’s spirit children, a smaller group distinguished itself by its exceeding faith in the Lord Jesus Christ during the conflicts that occurred incident to the war in heaven. Those who were valiant in these conflicts, and in other ways also, demonstrated both their abilities and their desires to become actively involved in the cosmic work of redemption through the great atonement of the Lord Jesus Christ. The thing that characterizes the Gods and those who aspire to godhood is the love of the work of redemption; that is, nurturing spirit children through the first estate of premortality, then leading them through a mortal probation, and finally raising them to the level of their parent Gods….the great work of the Gods is family work—the raising and nurturing of children and the redemption of families to be sealed together for all eternity. We cannot comprehend the cosmic proportions of the love and the infinite investment of labor and grace that go into this magnificent work. You and I, as members of the literal house of Israel and of the Church of Jesus Christ, were called in the premortal world to participate in that work, everything else being trivial in comparison. Redemption is not just one of the things going on in the universe; it is the thing. That work of redemption is the work to which the premortal covenant people, the house of Israel, were called, and it was to take precedence over all other work and to subordinate all other work to itself.[xiii]

Although they are proportionally few in number, today’s youth comprise an unparalleled army in the earth’s history. Elder Gene R. Cook said, “I salute a royal generation, the greatest generation of youth in number and quality to ever live on the face of the earth. The amount of good that is being done by you is immeasurable. Your influence will be felt worldwide before you have finished your stay on earth.”[xiv]

When we consider the proportionately small number of Israelites who have been found, gathered or born into the Church, we are awed by our children’s apparent premortal stature. Clearly, each is one in thousands. If the Lord’s intention is the redemption of all his children, no child’s birth into a Latter-day Saint home is a mistake or a roll of the dice.

The Work of Redemption within Families

God organizes his children into saving relationships so that the weak might be nurtured by the strong. That fact is most evident in families. God’s divine positioning often calls for weak children to be placed with strong parents, strong children to be placed with weak parents, or strong individuals to marry into weak families. Why? To do the work of redemption.

Catherine Thomas, said, “God may place spiritually challenging children in homes of spiritual and conscientious parents for their mutual benefit.”[xv] Carlford Broderick, an LDS marriage and family therapist, wrote:

My experience in various church callings and in my profession as a family therapist has convinced me that God actively intervenes in some destructive lineages, assigning a valiant spirit to break the chain of destructiveness in such families. Although these children may suffer innocently as victims of violence, neglect, and exploitation, through the grace of God some find the strength to “metabolize” the poison within themselves, refusing to pass it on to future generations. Before them were generations of destructive pain; after them the line flows clear and pure. Their children and children’s children will call them blessed. In suffering innocently that others might not suffer, such persons, in some degree, become as “saviors on Mount Zion” by helping to bring salvation to a lineage.[xvi]

Perspective on the Cosmic War for Souls

Are we prepared to disregard the volume of Restoration literature that pertains to redemption work in the spirit world, the foreknowledge and mercy of God, and the far-reaching effects of the Atonement of Jesus Christ? If so, we do both God and Christ a disservice by imagining limits to their ability to save. To gain perspective, let us review some truths.

Our children are ancient souls, who practiced righteousness and did the work of redemption over vast periods of time. During that enormous duration, the focus of their attention was to become like their heavenly parents by coming to earth, gaining a body, achieving a glorious resurrection, and earning exaltation. Our children bring with them mature gospel knowledge. It may be buried deep in their souls, but it is there just the same. The Fall may have caused them temporary amnesia, but God has not forgotten who they are or what they did. He said, “I will not forget thee. Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands.”[xvii]

Of course, neither has Satan forgotten our children. These are they who helped Michael cast out the devil and his angels from heaven, causing Satan to swear in his wrath that he would destroy them in the flesh. And for good reason. Satan knew if our children were allowed to continue their premortal work, they would conquer him again and cast him into outer darkness forever. Therefore, the war in heaven goes on, and this earth is its frontline. Hence, while the world is merely tempted,[xviii] our children are viciously attacked.[xix] Why are our children so ruthlessly confronted? Brigham Young had the answer:

God never bestows upon his people, or upon an individual, superior blessings without a severe trial to prove them, to prove that individual, or that people, to see whether they will keep their covenants with him, and keep in remembrance what he has shown them. Then the greater the vision [or blessings], the greater the display of the power of the enemy. So when individuals are blessed with visions, revelations, and great manifestations, look out, then the Devil is nigh you, and you will be tempted in proportion to the visions, revelation, or manifestation you have received.[xx]

Our children’s premortal nobility, righteousness and exceedingly good works warranted extraordinary blessings and opportunities in this life—royal birth, immediate access to gospel blessings, and so forth. But these blessings carried a price. The adversary would attack in proportion to their blessings, and once seemingly invincible souls, weakened by the Fall, would now be more susceptible to cutting down and wounding.

Wounded, But Not Defeated

The Book of Mormon contains a possible latter-day parallel and a promise. Imagine our children like the ancient Stripling Warriors, who, like their Nephite counterparts, are called upon to defend and save the kingdom. Premortally, our children were “exceedingly valiant for courage, and also for strength and activity; but behold, this was not all–they were men [and women] who were true at all times in whatsoever thing they were entrusted. Yea, they were men [and women] of truth and soberness, for they had been taught to keep the commandments of God and to walk uprightly before him.”[xxi]

Now, having forgotten all, our children have come to earth to be born of goodly mothers and fathers,[xxii] who try to teach them the gospel of Jesus Christ and prepare them to face the battle for the kingdom. Here, then, is an important lesson: Although every one of them is wounded in the battle with “many wounds,” “not one soul of them did perish.”[xxiii]

Although the comparison between the Stripling Warriors and latter-day youth has limitations, it nevertheless might give parents reason to hope and persevere knowing that perishing is not in the Lord’s design. President J. Reuben Clark said, “I believe that our Heavenly Father wants to save every one of his children.”[xxiv]

Divine Positioning at Work

One thing is certain: Parents are not cursed with wayward children; parents are called by God to rear and redeem these precious souls, in partnership with Jesus Christ. What we are experiencing is a trust. Therefore, we become to them “Saviors on Mount Zion.”[xxv] That they have been sent to our family is evidence of God’s divine positioning at work, and the purpose of that divine positioning is to redeem those for whom we have a responsibility. Because God called us to this work, he will make us equal to the challenge. President Hugh B. Brown’s apostolic blessing and promise to youth leaders might be applied to latter-day parents:

God help us all that we may do our part to prepare for that future, ominous though it may be. I leave a blessing with you…. From my heart I pray God to bless and guide you as you undertake to help to guide the youth of the Church, the reserves of the army of the Lord. I pray that God will bless you in your homes, in your work, in your play, and that He will give you faith and courage and fortitude to make you equal to your tasks. I pronounce this blessing upon you and promise that these things will be yours.[xxvi]

Author’s Note

Note: This article is adapted from Rescuing Wayward Children. Follow this link to learn more.

Also, to receive a sample of my new 5-book series, The Three Pillars of Zion, Click here.

[ii] D&C 93:30.

[iii] For example, see 1 Corinthians 10:13; Romans 8:28; Ether 12:27

[iv] Neal A. Maxwell, “These Are Your Days,” New Era, Jan 1985

[v] D&C 138:57

[vi] Ezra Taft Benson, “In His Steps,” Ensign, September 1988; Ezra Taft Benson, “You are a Marked Generation,” Ensign, April 1987

[vii] D&C 121:25

[viii] Romans 8:29

[ix] George D. Watt, ed., Journal of Discourses, vol 23:186-187, emphasis added

[x] Abraham 3:22-23

[xi] Spencer W. Kimball, “In Love and Power and without Fear,” New Era, July 1981

[xii] H. Burke Peterson, “Your Special Purpose,” New Era, October 2001

[xiii] M. Catherine Thomas, “Alma the Younger, Part 1,” Neal A. Maxwell Institute for Religious Scholarship

[xiv] Gene R. Cook, “The Seat Next to You,” New Era, October 1983

[xv] M. Catherine Thomas, “Alma the Younger, Part 1,” Neal A. Maxwell Institute for Religious Scholarship

[xvi] Carlfred Broderick, “I Have a Question,” Ensign, August 1986, p.38–9

[xvii] Isaiah 49:15-16

[xviii] D&C 29:39

[xix] D&C 76:28-29

[xx] Brigham Young, Discourses of Brigham Young, p. 338

[xxi] Alma 53:20-21

[xxii] Alma 56:47-48

[xxiii] Alma 57:25

[xxiv] J. Reuben Clark, Jr, Conference Report, 3 Oct. 1953, p.84

[xxv] Mark E. Petersen, Conference Report, October 1959, p.14: “I would like to talk with you about your ministry among your own children, because you are ministers of the Lord unto your children, and if you will do your duty by your children, you will be as saviors on Mount Zion to them….”

[xxvi] Hugh B. Brown, The Abundant Life, p.188

When we struggle over long periods of time to reawaken and rescue a wayward child, we might occasionally lapse and wonder, What’s in this for me? It is not necessarily a selfish question. Peter asked and was given an answer to this same query. Parents might apply the interchange between Peter and Jesus to themselves: “We have forsaken all, and followed thee; what shall we have therefore? And Jesus said unto them . . . Every one that hath forsaken houses, or brethren, or sisters, or father, or mother, or wife, or children, or lands, for my name’s sake, shall receive an hundredfold, and shall inherit everlasting life.”[ii]

Imagine! Sacrifices made for the sake of Christ’s work are rewarded “an hundredfold” and with “everlasting life”! Persistently and righteously dealing with a wayward child is counted as a sacrifice in time and selflessness, among other things.

When adversity strikes, we often focus on what it is doing to us rather than what it is doing for us. The process of experiencing adversity is designed to chip away at our rough edges and strengthen muscles of character and spirituality that are essential to becoming gods. Joseph Smith said, “I am like a huge, rough stone rolling down from a high mountain; and the only polishing I get is when some corner gets rubbed off by coming in contact with something else . . . all hell knocking off a corner here and a corner there. Thus I will become a smooth and polished shaft in the quiver of the Almighty.”[iii]

Adversity is a Propelling Force

Adversity is painful but necessary for spiritual fervency. As long as the brother of Jared was struggling in the wilderness, he offered consistent, urgent prayer, which not only guided him day by day but also opened the windows of heaven to the vast library of celestial truth. But when he experienced a season of calm, he, one of the greatest prophets, became spiritually lax, for which the Lord severely chastised him.[iv]

Likewise, because the Lord wants us to keep growing in spirituality and moving toward exaltation, He will give us pressing reasons to pray (praying for a wayward child is an example). The present adversity simply acts as a catalyst to bring us to the Lord. The brother of Jared prayed to overcome the adversity of darkness in his barges and he was brought into the presence of the Lord.[v] Joseph Smith prayed for deliverance from Liberty Jail and was blessed with astounding information about the functions and promises of the priesthood.[vi] Abraham prayed for deliverance from the wicked priest of Elkenah and was given an amazing promise of priesthood ministry through which all of God’s children would be blessed.[vii]

These prophets received answers to their individual prayers, but the Lord had even more to give them. Adversity got them there. Praying over anything, even wayward children, can unlock the treasury of heaven. Contemplated in this light, then, adversity can be a gift. Humans seem to be naturally incapable of maintaining mighty prayer without the motivator of adversity.

Remembering Lehi’s exposition on the law of opposites, we learn that adversity is also essential for happiness to exist.[viii] We wouldn’t know joy for what it was without pain to compare it to. In addition, happiness is only one of the rewards for enduring adversity in faith; gain is another: God “shall consecrate thine afflictions for thy gain.”[ix] Like the examples of the brother of Jared, Joseph Smith, and Abraham, compensation that goes beyond the price of our present adversity occurs when God consecrates our afflictions for our gain. Heavenly Father enjoys the perfection of this principle; He deals with the adversity of wayward children all the time and yet describes His life as having a “fulness of joy.”[x] That fact should give us hope as we progress toward godhood; we should remember that our adversity will not always overwhelm us but will actually propel us into a life of complete joy.

The Work of Redemption: Pain and Joy at Extremes

Sometimes we may feel exhausted in trying to comprehend all that is required of us to reach this eternal goal. One exasperated father who was struggling with a rebellious son, joked, “The terrestrial kingdom is looking better and better all the time.” We might feel the same way—Is forever dealing with difficult children the definition of life in heaven? Perhaps understanding the opportunity in adversity might help us set our sites higher.

But our residence is not yet the celestial kingdom. For now the scales are tipped in favor of adversity, not joy. To help us arrive where He is at, be like He is, and experience a fulness of joy, Heavenly Father is not timid about allowing us to confront adversity. Because we desired to become like Him and covenanted do His redeeming work, should we be surprised that He takes our desires and our covenants seriously and therefore hands us redeeming assignments? The work of redemption can be long-term, excruciating work, but, as missionaries can testify, no work is more satisfying to the soul than that of redemption. Or, as parents can testify, the only joy greater than giving physical life is giving spiritual life—that is, to see their children turn from error and discover the safety and joy of living righteous lives.

Likewise, the only pain worse than physical pain is spiritual pain.

A mother in Arizona wrote,

“Nothing could have prepared me for the excruciating pain of my first delivery. I had thought that I wanted to have the full experience, so I turned down the epidural. I did fine for the first few hours, and then my water broke. The sudden, blinding pain was more than I could bear, and I was only dilated to three—I had hours to go. When the nurse offered me the epidural, I gladly agreed. In fact, when the doctor was delayed because he was treating another patient, I began to panic. I couldn’t get relief from the pain fast enough.

“At the time, I thought, Who would knowingly go through pregnancy and delivery again? But for as much pain as I experienced that day, it was nothing compared to the spiritual suffering I experienced when that same, sweet little boy abandoned the Church and broke my heart. And I have felt no [greater] joy and satisfaction than from lovingly and patiently working with him, and finally seeing him return to God and marry in the temple.”

God knows something about the work of redemption that we are in the process of discovering. With His eternal perspective, He must find great satisfaction in rearing children through all the stages of their existence and patiently working them through their periodic bouts of waywardness until He finally brings them to the point that they embrace the truth and never again depart from it. To learn the satisfying and eternal work of redemption, we need training, and what better place and time than here and now when the need for redemption is so great and the stakes are so high?

The Plan of Happiness is Worth Our Sacrifice

Speaking of the plan of happiness that we first must learn and then teach, Elder Bruce C. Hafen made the following statement:

“We are away at school, trying to master the lessons of “the great plan of happiness” so we can return home and know what it means to be there. Over and over the Lord tells us why the plan is worth our sacrifice—and His. Eve called it ‘the joy of our redemption’ (Moses 5:11). Jacob called it ‘that happiness which is prepared for the saints’ (2 Ne. 9:43). Of necessity, the plan is full of thorns and tears—His and ours. But because He and we are so totally in this together, our being ‘at one’ with Him in overcoming all opposition will itself bring us ‘incomprehensible joy.’”[xi]

To increase our capacity to do the work of redemption, Heavenly Father gives us gifts that would be difficult to develop without the vehicle of adversity. Two of these gifts are experience and redemption.

All These Things Shall Give Thee Experience

The Lord’s words, “all these things shall give thee experience,” [xii] are not always comforting. Of course, by experience we usually mean adverse experience. One father from Idaho said, “This is at once the most frightening and comforting phrase in the scriptures.”

Somehow we anticipate that our experience might include, as Joseph Smith was told in the bowels of Liberty Jail, our being “cast into the pit” where we helplessly stand by as our enemies decide our fate; or our being “cast into the deep” amidst the “billowing surge” and “fierce winds”; or our being enveloped by gathering “blackness,” while “all the elements combine to hedge up the way”; or worse, our being threatened by “the very jaws of hell” that seek to devour us.[xiii] We feel the weight of experience when our children rebel and break our hearts and when there seems to be little we can do to stop them. At such times of difficulty, we may ask, How can such harsh experience be for my good?

Somewhere deep inside us, we know the answer: By means of harsh experience we will gain, not lose, and, beyond every other consideration, what we will gain is the power of redemption. In the process, we are being blessed with invaluable spiritual gifts, and we are developing the necessary qualities of character to do redeeming work.

Redemptive Power Preceded by Opposing Experience

Evidently, eternal law requires that the receipt of power be preceded and developed by experience. Lehi put it another way—that to gain anything desirable, we must experience its corresponding opposite: “it must needs be, that there is an opposition in all things.”[xiv] Therefore, there is opportunity in experiencing the adversity of weakness, sickness, financial woes, relationship problems, disagreeable people, wayward children, or, as Lehi listed, wickedness, misery, death, corruption, and insensibility.[xv]

Opposition “must needs be,” Lehi declared. We must experience the opposites or opposition in all things. Therefore, we are not sheltered from opposition here. Otherwise, there could be no righteousness, holiness, goodness, incorruption, happiness, sensation, and no existence.[xvi] Thankfully, in the process of experiencing opposition, we secure power through the Atonement to overcome opposition. That is, our opposition experience leads to power: “Ye receive no witness [blessing] until after the trial of [opposition to] your faith.”[xvii] To become like God, we must experience what He has experienced, so that we, like He, might gain the power to triumph.[xviii]

Here, we learn again that every effort we make to face and overcome opposition by sanctifying ourselves has a redeeming effect upon the person for whom we are praying. Sanctification infuses us with power to triumph over the opposition so that might better do the work of redemption. In the end, the redeemed do the redeeming. How do we sanctify ourselves? By accepting and learning from our experiences, by our efforts to improve ourselves spiritually, and by our encounters with the Holy Spirit. These things lead to wisdom, which leads to power, which collectively make us better partners with God in the work of redemption. Thus, the cycle of redemption is one of faith in Christ, repentance, purification through committing to and better living the covenants, becoming more sanctified through the Holy Ghost, divine rescue from adversity, then helping other to duplicate this cycle.

How the Prophets Gained Redemptive Power

Consider Enos, who went through the cycle of experiencing adversity then redemption by applying the teaching of his redeemed father, Jacob. Subsequently, Enos desired to extend the blessings of redemption to his family, his countrymen, and even his enemies. Once he had been redeemed, he could not rest without trying to redeem someone else. Evidently his desire and consequently bestowed power to redeem others remained with him to the end of his life. When he was about to die, he declared that he had been “wrought upon by the power of God that I must preach and prophesy unto this people, and declare the word according to the truth which is in Christ. And I have declared it in all my days, and have rejoiced in it above that of the world.”[xix]

Consider Alma the Elder, who experienced adversity and then repented of his sins at the preaching of a redeemed Abinadi. When Alma experienced personal redemption, he “went about privately among the people, and began to teach the words of Abinadi—Yea, concerning that which was to come, and also concerning the resurrection of the dead, and the redemption of the people, which was to be brought to pass through the power, and sufferings, and death of Christ, and his resurrection and ascension into heaven.”[xx] The now-redeemed Alma the Elder had gained, through the cycle of experiencing adversity and being redeemed from it, the power of redemption by which he helped to redeem the entire Church and his own wayward son.

Consider Alma’s son, Alma the Younger, who experienced adversity, then also repented of his sins after remembering the teachings of his redeemed father, who had developed the power of redemption to the extent that he could call down angelic help from heaven. When the now-redeemed younger Alma had experienced the adversity-redemption cycle, he declared that he had been “redeemed of the Lord . . . redeemed from the gall of bitterness and bonds of iniquity.”[xxi] Thereafter, the redeemed Alma the Younger went about “from this time forward” to teach the unredeemed people, “preaching the word of God in much tribulation, being greatly persecuted by those who were unbelievers, being smitten by many of them” [xxii] in order that he, along with the sons of Mosiah, might become the redeeming “instruments in the hands of God in bringing many to the knowledge of the truth, yea, to the knowledge of their Redeemer.”[xxiii] Within eight years, the redeemed Alma the Younger developed the power of redemption to the point that he could succeed his father as president of the Church and thereby extend his redeeming influence to embrace many people.

Consider the sons of Mosiah, who Mormon described as “the very vilest of sinners.”[xxiv] Nevertheless, by the teachings and prayers of their redeemed father, they were rescued by the same angelic experience as Alma the Younger. Now having experienced the adversity-redemption cycle, they sought to become the redeemers: “Now they were desirous that salvation should be declared to every creature, for they could not bear that any human soul should perish; yea, even the very thought that any soul should endure endless torment did cause them to quake and tremble.”[xxv] Through experiencing adversity and redemption, the sons of Mosiah gained the power of redemption and helped to save “many thousands of [their] brethren . . . from the pains of hell; and they are brought to sing redeeming love.”[xxvi]

And so it is with each of us who experiences adversity followed by redemption. Once we are redeemed we begin to gain the power to redeem others, and as we seek to sanctify ourselves through righteous living, that power to redeem increases.

Desiring and Being Empowered to Redeem Others

One mother expressed how her personal cycle of redemption resulted in her increased capacity to help to redeem others. We will call her “Joy.”

After having been redeemed from her own suffering during a difficult recovery after childbirth, Joy felt a desire to redeem others. One day, while she was bathing her newborn child, she felt an overwhelming gratitude for Heavenly Father’s mercy in helping her overcome that difficult delivery; she thus offered a prayer asking how she might extend that mercy to others. Suddenly, a beautiful woman appeared before Joy and told her that she was Joy’s third great-grandmother. The woman said that she loved Joy as if there were no generational distance between them. She desired to be sealed to Joy and asked Joy to help her.

Although Joy had never done family history work before, she began immediately and was filled with the testimony of that work. Over time, her capacity grew, and her happiness eventually exceeded the suffering of the former difficult recovery that had brought her to this point. Having now experienced the Lord’s redeeming mercy in her life, Joy received the desire and divine power to become a redeemer. Through her efforts, Joy not only brought the blessings of salvation to her third great-grandmother but to thousands of her kindred dead.

Within every experience of adversity there is a waiting blessing that will transcend the experience, and that blessing will usually come in the form of greater ability to redeem others.

So here is the point: If the only way we can gain the power of redemption is through personally experiencing redemption, it stands to reason that we need something to be redeemed from. Therefore, Heavenly Father places us in a fallen situation where weakness and adversity are certain and where sin are inevitable. The plan of redemption provides that once we are hurt or slip up, Jesus would be there to heal and redeem us. Then, having experienced redemption firsthand, we gain the desire and power to become the redeemers for other. Over time, as we exercise the power of redemption, we grow in our capacity to redeem until we become like God, who has infinite redemptive power.

Thus, the Fall was necessary and potentially a huge blessing. Nevertheless, experiencing its effects and watching it break those whom we love can be heart wrenching. During such times, we pray for perspective to see the opportunity in the present adverse experience, and we plead that God will increase our ability to redeem so that we likewise might help to rescue wayward ones. Our ultimate hope, of course, is that the wayward soul will overcome the adversity and experience redemption firsthand. When that happens, the cycle will repeat itself, and the redeemed soul will gain the power of redemption and desire to redeem others.

Author’s Note

Note: This article is adapted from Rescuing Wayward Children. Follow this link to learn more.

Also, to receive a sample of my new 5-book series, The Three Pillars of Zion, Click here.

[ii] Matthew 19:27–29.

[iii] Joseph Fielding Smith, ed., Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith, 304.

[iv] See Ether 1–2.

[v] See Ether 2–3.

[vi] See D&C 121.

[vii] See Abraham 1:15–19.

[viii] See 2 Nephi 2:11.

[ix] 2 Nephi 2:2.

[x] 3 Nephi 28:10.

[xi] Bruce C. Hafen, “The Atonement: All for All,” Ensign, May 2004, 98.

[xii] D&C 122:7.

[xiii] D&C 122:7.

[xiv] 2 Nephi 2:11.

[xv] See 2 Nephi 2:11.

[xvi] See 2 Nephi 2:11.

[xvii] Ether 12:6.

[xviii] See Joseph Fielding Smith, ed., Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith, 297.

[xix] Enos 1:26.

[xx] Mosiah 18:1–2, emphasis added.

[xxi] Mosiah 27:24, 29.

[xxii] Mosiah 27:32.

[xxiii] Mosiah 27:36.

[xxiv] Mosiah 28:4.

[xxv] Mosiah 28:3.

[xxvi] Alma 26:13.

You are writing your record wholly for the generation of people who will be converted to Jesus Christ by your writings and who will prepare the earth for his Second Coming. To that end, you are allowed to see the future as if you lived in it. As you write this book, you will come to understand that future generation better than most people who would live in it, so well, in fact, that you will be able to glean parallel incidents from your present history and apply them to that future people.

Mormon Saw Our Day in Detail

It is safe to say that few prophets knew us better than Mormon. Given his extraordinary mandate and visionary gift, we might conclude that he never wrote one word of the Book of Mormon to teach history; rather, he wrote the book to convince all men “of the Jew and Gentile that JESUS is the CHRIST, the ETERNAL GOD.”[i] He wrote the Book of Mormon to teach us the fullness of the gospel and to prepare and warn us of the coming of the Lord. Furthermore, Mormon includes clear instruction within the pages of the Book of Mormon to liken the book’s teachings unto ourselves.[ii]

So, if you were Mormon and if you were to take a long, prophetic view of latter-day parenting challenges, and if you were to see an epidemic of waywardness, what lessons would you draw from your history to instruct and give hope to those future parents?

Mormon chose powerful examples, one of which was the story of Alma and his son. To set up this story, he related an important incident of the Nephite “pioneers,” whom the Lord had delivered and brought to the land of promise, Zarahemla. These stalwart people, who had sacrificed so much to establish their Zion, were raising children who did not believe, as had their parents. Here is how Mormon described these children of the next generation:

Now it came to pass that there were many of the rising generation that could not understand the words of king Benjamin, being little children at the time he spake unto his people; and they did not believe the tradition of their fathers.

They did not believe what had been said concerning the resurrection of the dead, neither did they believe concerning the coming of Christ.

And now because of their unbelief they could not understand the word of God; and their hearts were hardened.

And they would not be baptized; neither would they join the church. And they were a separate people as to their faith, and remained so ever after, even in their carnal and sinful state; for they would not call upon the Lord their God.[iii]

This frightening account of children abandoning their parents’ beliefs and following paths of carnality and sin resonates in too many LDS families. Mormon continued by demonstrating that no set of parents, not even the king of the land or the prophet of God, is safe from the effects of the plague of wayward children: “Now the sons of Mosiah were numbered among the unbelievers; and also one of the sons of Alma was numbered among them, he being called Alma, after his father….”[iv] Clearly, Satan can reach into any family and snatch away any of our innocent children.

Parents’ Reactions to Wayward Children

Of course, when this happens to us, we parents feel grief-stricken. President James E. Faust said, “The depth of the love of parents for their children cannot be measured. It is like no other relationship. It exceeds concern for life itself…The grief of a parent over a rebellious child is almost inconsolable.”[v] We parents feel isolated, ashamed and guilty. In vain we internalize and personalize the child’s bad behavior. “What did I do wrong? Why didn’t I see this coming?”

We groan under the weight of apparent scriptural indictments: “And again, inasmuch as parents have children in Zion, or in any of her stakes which are organized, that teach them not to understand the doctrine of repentance, faith in Christ the Son of the living God, and of baptism and the gift of the Holy Ghost by the laying on of the hands, when eight years old, the sin be upon the heads of the parents…And they shall also teach their children to pray, and to walk uprightly before the Lord.”[vi]

Perhaps worst, we feel helpless to change things. We could employ tough love and risk destroying the relationship, or we could silently watch and mourn and risk losing the child completely. How should we act? Where are the answers? Where is power to change things?

The scriptures give us an answer.

First, perspective. The Fall renders us significantly impotent. We ever feel sin beckoning us, and we cannot escape the realities of corruption, aging, disease and opposition. Mortality is a hard experience for our children and for us.

Second, grace. We cannot make it alone. The Fall is an impossible situation without divine intervention and help. Only Jesus Christ can give us the strength to persevere, overcome and do good works.

Third, strength. Strength to do what? When Nephi’s brothers bound him, we have been taught most recently by Elder Bednar,[vii] Nephi did not pray that the Lord would eliminate his circumstances; rather, he prayed to draw upon the power of the atonement for strength to change his circumstances. Nephi knew that he had limited power, but the Lord had infinite power. Because Nephi and the Lord were bound together by covenant, he could tap into that higher power and change his situation.

Parents as Agents of Change

For a parent to become an agent of change, capable of acting in the strength of the Lord, suggests global perspective offered by the Plan of Redemption, intense faith in Jesus Christ, and courageous implementation of the redemptive principles. The gospel teaches us this powerful truth: Every effort that we make to increase our level of sanctification has a direct redeeming effect on those for whom we are praying, as evidenced in the account of Alma the Elder. In other words, the redeemed do the redeeming; the sanctified do the sanctifying. The gospel of Jesus Christ holds the spiritual solution for spiritual waywardness.

Of course, nothing trumps agency, and no guarantee could ever been made that a child will ultimately choose to turn from a life of waywardness. Nevertheless, these principles are so powerful that the prophets have used very little qualifying language in making sweeping promises. Certainly it is possible for anyone to sin away from salvation, nevertheless, the atonement has a much greater reach than we might imagine.

Such optimism from the prophets for eventual success should kindle hope within any parent’s despairing heart. These empowering principles and promises should be good news for parents. Rather than languishing in hopelessness, while watching children die spiritually, parents can employ the sanctifying principles found in the Plan of Redemption and expect miracles to happen.

And miracles do happen!

The Plan of Redemption is a living, breathing, practical reality, and parents of the covenant have access to it to save their spiritually sick children. The mountain of evidence is astounding. Again, while nothing can interfere with a child’s freedom of choice, nevertheless, the Lord has promised that in his own due time—even if that time extends into the next life—he will tailor-make conversion opportunities for every wayward child, just as he did for Alma, the sons of Mosiah, Paul, and others, and attempt to call them back.

Because redemption is only possible through the gospel of Jesus Christ, the spiritual solution that the prophets and scriptures have set forth offer parents perspective, spiritual tools and hope. Ask yourself these questions:

Perspective

• What kind of a world do our children live in?
• What is their true divine nature?
• What quality of adversity are they facing in these latter-days?
• Who are we parents of the latter-days, and what is our divine appointment?
• Is a child’s waywardness a reflection of our failing or Heavenly Father’s trust?

Spiritual Tools

• What are the great benefits—gifts—that we receive by working with our wayward children? How do these benefits equip us for our eternal calling?
• How do we become partners with heavenly beings in the redemption process?
• What are the redemptive skills taught as the “heart of the gospel message”?
• How do we gain power to become saviors on Mount Zion? How can we learn to sanctify ourselves first so that we might be empowered to rescue others?
• How can we gain the power to ask for and receive blessings?

Hope

• What are the prophets’ promises to parents concerning wayward children?
• Are these promises really true: Victory is the Lord’s goal? Spiritual rescue is his work and glory?

The Individual Plans within the Plan of Salvation

The scriptures, which were written for our day, contain powerful principles that can turn each of us into a savior on Mount Zion in the similitude of the Savior of the world. We learn that the Plan of Salvation is just that: a plan to save. Said another way, within the Plan of Salvation is a personal plan of salvation for each of us and each of our children. We are no more the authors of that individual plan of salvation than we are the universal Plan of Salvation. In the beginning, we understand, God considered his children on both a global and an individual basis, and he devised a plan to rescue them—a plan that was as perfect as he is. We parents are invited and commissioned to participate in that plan, but we are not required to create it.

Imagine that you had just been called to be the Young Women’s president or a bishop, and you had several girls who were wayward. Of course, you would be concerned about them, but hopefully you would not take their choice of waywardness personally. You would face the challenge knowing that God had called you to work with these girls at this very time for this very situation. Your calling is a trust, not a failing!

Because you would have that perspective, although you might feel overwhelmed, you would know that Heavenly Father prepares and qualifies those whom he calls. To help rescue these girls, you have one of two choices: (1) You could stay up nights, wring your hands, worry, and blame yourself for your shortcomings and their decisions, or (2) Put all your energy into personal sanctification so that you could better participate in the Father’s plan of salvation for these girls.

You would be aware of the gap between your ability and the enormity of the challenge, and that realization would drive you to your knees to plead for grace, that principle of power that requires you to give your best effort with Christ’s promise that he will make up the difference. Without grace, you could never do work that is reserved for the Gods.

A Divine Trust, Not a Failing

Parents should feel this way and let go of the paralyzing feelings of failure. We are involved in a carefully orchestrated trust, which was foreseen and provided for in the atonement. We, personally, were prepared for and will be strengthened to accomplish that trust. In accomplishing our mission, we do not have to create a plan of salvation; we simply need to increase our spiritual capacity to better participate in God’s plan, as he reveals it to us. We are not alone; we are partners!

Through the sealing ordinances of the temple, special powers are given to parents to tether a child to them. Harnessing that power is the discovery of a lifetime and an important step in assuming the work of God. We are novices, and God understands that we are getting on-the-job training. Therefore, he provides for us the principle of grace. Despite our weaknesses and failings, God ultimately is in control. Our children are being worked with by the greatest powers in the universe—and these beings never consider failure as an option. They are very good at what they do—the best! They are the ones who extend the promises and affect the miracles. They understand timing, circumstances and relationships. There really is no way we can distance ourselves from the love of God.

We partner with God by means of our covenants, and he allows us to vitalize his plan of salvation for our wayward children by means of our personal sanctification. The highest level of sanctification comes through temple worship, and the temple is where we receive many of our answers. The more we learn about the covenants, priesthood and the ordinances of the priesthood, the more power is infused into our life. Then gospel becomes a tool rather than a culture. The power of the temple ordinances is greater than any of us understand. Eventually, they will reel a wayward child home.

Embracing the “Easy” Answer

Is the solution for spiritual rescue too Sunday School—another pat answers for an extremely difficult problem? Amazingly, the gospel is simple. In explaining how easy it was to harness the power of the Liahona, Alma said, “O my son, do not let us be slothful because of the easiness of the way; for so was it with our fathers; for so was it prepared for them, that if they would look they might live; even so it is with us. The way is prepared, and if we will look we may live forever.”[viii]

Is it really that easy? The solution, yes; the effort, not necessarily. Nevertheless, the prophets’ promises are so many and so unqualified that they give us cause to center our hope in Christ and move forward. The divine resources that are available to us are amazingly expansive, and the vast body of confirming evidence of eventual success is overwhelming. Therefore, to discount the Lord’s power to reclaim, even from incredible distances, or to minimize the power that the Lord has placed within our reach is to disparage the redeeming power of the infinite and universal atonement of Jesus Christ.

Absolutely, there is hope.

Author’s Note:

Note: This article is adapted from Rescuing Wayward Children. Follow this link to learn more.

Also, to receive a sample of my new 5-book series, The Three Pillars of Zion, Click here.

[ii] 1 Nephi 19:23.

[iii] Mosiah 26:1-4.

[iv] Mosiah 27:8.

[v] James E. Faust, “Dear Are The Sheep That Have Wandered,” Ensign, May 2003.

[vi] D&C 68:25, 28.

[vii] David A. Bednar, “In the Strength of the Lord,” Ensign, Nov 2004, 76–78.

[viii] Alma 37:46.

Forgiveness is a spiritual gift that is obtained by asking for it “with a sincere heart, with real intent”[ii] (that is, with the real intention to forgive). Parents of wayward children often face a number of people whom they must forgive: their children, judgmental onlookers, and themselves.

Often, fasting and requesting a priesthood blessing to obtain this spiritual gift is helpful. Receiving a priesthood blessing has another benefit; through the power of the priesthood the adversary may be detected and cast away, for it is often the adversary who blunts our ability to forgive and buffets us with the miserable effects of carrying a grudge. Both the recipient and the priesthood holder can profit from the Lord’s counsel on casting out the “dark spirits” under Satan’s influence: “This kind goeth not out but by prayer and fasting.”[iii]

The Example of Job

Job’s life is a powerful and interesting lesson on forgiveness. Job was an ancient priest and judge who was highly respected and very wealthy. He was doing everything right when suddenly everything went wrong. In an instant, he lost his seven sons and three daughters. Then he lost his wealth and his health. When he was cast from his home to take up residence near the city’s refuse pile, he was separated from his wife—possibly one of his hardest trials.

Then three of his friends (and later a fourth) came to comfort him. They were so astonished at his condition and appearance that they could not utter a word but rather sat with him in silence for seven days, “for they saw that his grief was very great.”[iv] At that point, the unimaginable happened—Job’s friends turned against him and accused him of sin. They imagined that nothing short of misdeeds and flaws in his character could produce such misery. Surely, they said, Job was now reaping the reward for his poor choices and bad conduct.

Job, however, was not a sinner “deserving” of his trials. Do we feel the same way—judged by other of self-judged to be deserving of the trials of having a wayward child? Sometimes we play both the roles of the martyr and accusing friends; we berate ourselves and take responsibility when children stray from the path of righteousness. Often, our quick assumption is that we’re suffering because of our own shortcomings. While there may be an element of truth to that statement (and if there is, we ought to quickly repent), our shortcomings typically pale in comparison to the child’s use of agency. Nevertheless, we are prone to errantly assign personal blame as though we could read the mind of God. We are quick to judge ourselves harshly, and thereby we become our own worst enemies, much like Job’s judgmental friends, who were willing to accuse Job while he was suffering.

Amazingly, despite all the false accusations and abuse, Job maintained his integrity. He knew that sin was not the cause of his affliction. Obviously, Job knew the Lord well enough to know that he was right before the Lord. If escaping his circumstance were as easy as admitting to a mistake, Job would have gladly done so. But he had received no such divine communication, so he was duty-bound to maintain his integrity and wait for the Lord to deliver him and give him further instructions.

The Final Trial of Job

In the end, the Lord vindicated Job by chastising Job’s friends. Speaking to one of them, Eliphaz, the Lord said, “My wrath is kindled against thee, and against thy two friends: for ye have not spoken of me the thing that is right, as my servant Job hath.” Then, in an extraordinary gesture to reach out to the friends and invite them to repent (and the result would become Job’s ultimate test), the Lord commanded Eliphaz and the friends, “Therefore take unto you now seven bullocks and seven rams, and go to my servant Job, and offer up for yourselves a burnt offering; and my servant Job shall pray for you: for him will I accept: lest I deal with you after your folly.” [v]

The final trial of Job was forgiveness!

After all that had happened to him, after all the abuse, could Job now forgive and pray for his friends? Yes. And the result was astounding: “And the Lord turned the captivity of Job, when he prayed for his friends: also the Lord gave Job twice as much as he had before.”[vi] Through the powerful act of forgiveness, Job’s captivity was turned; through the powerful act of forgiveness, Job was able to rescue and reclaim his friends; and through the powerful act of forgiveness, the Lord restored to Job twice as much as he had had before.

Forgiveness—Coming Near to Perfection

At some point, and perhaps at many points along the way, we will have to forgive our wayward child, other judgmental people, and ourselves. And, as President Kimball stated, if we are able to forgive sincerely, we are “near to perfection.”[vii]

Our reward for having made this sacrifice—for forgiveness is at least a sacrifice of pride—will be much more than what was required of us in order to forgive: twice as much in the case of Job, and even more in other cases. In the early days of the restored Church, the suffering, forgiving Latter-day Saints were told, “And again, if your enemy shall smite you the second time, and you revile not against your enemy, and bear it patiently, your reward shall be an hundredfold.”[viii]

The reward comes from our having learned to be like God. Struggling to comprehend the boundaries of forgiveness, Peter asked Jesus, “Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.”[ix] That is, we cannot become sons and daughters of God without being able to forgive without limitation. To emphasize this point, the Lord taught a parable that reveals something we must learn in order to become like Him—the capacity and desire to forgive endlessly, even when sins are severe and enormous:

Therefore is the kingdom of heaven likened unto a certain king, which would take account of his servants.

And when he had begun to reckon, one was brought unto him, which owed him ten thousand talents.

But forasmuch as he had not to pay, his lord commanded him to be sold, and his wife, and children, and all that he had, and payment to be made.

The servant therefore fell down, and worshipped him, saying, Lord, have patience with me, and I will pay thee all.

Then the lord of that servant was moved with compassion, and loosed him, and forgave him the debt.[x]

Forgiveness–One of the Greatest Tests of Discipleship

We are part of the kingdom of heaven; we are the servants of the King who will take account of us. Our debt to sin is massive; we cannot pay it. The demands of justice are unbearable. His patience with and mercy toward us are what we plead for. Because the King is compassionate, He is willing to loose us from our burden and forgive our debt. But if we will not extend the same courtesy to another debtor, as the parable later details, we kindle the wrath of the King, who will deliver us to the tormentors until we pay all that was originally due.[xi] Our casually forgiving someone will not suffice; we must do so from our heart, the most sensitive and tender part of our soul. We cannot truly forgive and hold anything back. If we are not willing to do this, we commit the “greater sin.”[xii]

Because the trait of forgiveness defines Jesus, and because we must develop this principle of salvation to become like Him, He gives us multiple opportunities to learn it in mortality, primarily with those whom we love the most. Forgiveness is one of the greatest tests of discipleship. Being willing to forgive speaks to our desire to become like Christ, for by forgiving we lay the groundwork for the sinner’s redemption.

The Christlike saint seeks to redeem and reclaim while Satan seeks to captivate and destroy. One reason that we withhold forgiveness is to hold the sinner in a form of spiritual bondage. That is a reason why non-forgiveness is such a serious sin. We simply cannot be Saints and do the work of Satan on any level. On the other hand, sincere forgiveness closes the door on Satan, who would use the unsettled issue to destroy our souls. Therefore, for the sake of our souls and the souls of all others who sin or judge harshly, we must forgive. And we start the process by forgiving ourselves.

Author’s Note:

Note: This article is adapted from Rescuing Wayward Children. Follow this link to learn more.

Also, to receive a sample of my new 5-book series, The Three Pillars of Zion, Click here.

[ii] Moroni 10:4.

[iii] Matthew 17:21.

[iv] Job 2:13.

[v] Job 42:7–8, emphasis added.

[vi] Job 42:10.

[vii] Spencer W. Kimball, The Teachings of Spencer W. Kimball, 204.

[viii] D&C 98:25.

[ix] Matthew 18:21–22.

[x] Matthew 18:23–27.

[xi] See Matthew 18:34.

[xii] D&C 64:9.

This outstanding observation was brought home to me in the 1980 Holiday Bowl where Brigham Young University was pitted against Southern Methodist University. BYU entered the game with an 11–1 record, and SMU had an 8–3 record. BYU had overwhelmed its opponent with a powerful passing game orchestrated by quarterback Jim McMahon. But SMU had an explosive running offense led by Craig James and Eric Dickerson.

With four minutes left in the game, SMU scored to take a commanding 45–25 lead over BYU, which now appeared to be headed for yet another bowl loss. They simply could not handle SMU’s offense. At this point of apparent hopelessness, my wife and I decided to spare ourselves the misery of watching BYU go down in defeat. We left our children with my mother and headed to a movie theater.

When we returned, my mother met us at the door and excitedly announced that BYU had won. They had scored three touchdowns in the last two and a half minutes of the game. Thereafter, the game was to be called the “Miracle Bowl,” and it has taken its place in history as one of the most exciting college bowl games ever played. And we had been too discouraged and impatient to see the miracle.

We were not alone. At the four-minute mark, most of the BYU fans had begun leaving the stadium when McMahon screamed that the game wasn’t over yet. Very few believed him. Nevertheless, undaunted, he promptly threw a touchdown pass. This was followed by several more smart moves that decreased the gap in scores. After throwing two incomplete passes, McMahon then launched a “Hail Mary” into the end zone as time expired. What resulted was one of the most miraculous touchdowns in college football history. Then, with the score tied, BYU’s Kurt Gunther kicked the extra point to give BYU a miraculous 46–45 victory.

In the last two minutes and thirty-three seconds of the game, BYU scored 21 points—and we had missed it!

Never Give Up

When all seems lost, we must not give up. President Benson said there is no question about the final outcome—righteousness will achieve victory.[ii] Victory is in our future, even if that victory comes at the very last second. To achieve that victory, the Lord will call upon players on both sides of the veil. Our responsibility is to persevere by keeping one eye fixed on the goal and the other on what needs to happen today. Even if a child seems to be sinning away his salvation, we must never give up hope.

Robert L. Millet wrote though “there are limits, not necessarily to God’s mercy but to the extent to which mercy can temper justice,”[iii] nevertheless, there is still hope. He said, “I have a conviction that when a person passes through the veil of death, all those impediments and challenges and crosses that were beyond his or her power to control—abuse, neglect, immoral environment, weighty traditions, etc.—will be torn away like a film. Then perhaps that person shall, as President Woodruff suggested, see and feel things he or she could not see and feel Before.”[iv]

“Linda,” a mother in Utah, wrote of clinging to hope, even up until the very last minute.

My husband and I have five children. I learned from my two oldest to never give up. Our oldest son, “Ben,” started hanging with a bad group and drifted away from the Church. At one point, he told us that the Joseph Smith story was a load of baloney. He started smoking and experimenting with drugs. He stayed away from church for several years. We fasted and prayed for him constantly; we put his name in the temple religiously, and we tried to include him in family prayers and family home evening, as much as he would allow.

Once, at a regional conference, Elder Holland spoke and gave the congregation an apostolic blessing. He promised that if we as parents were faithful in all things, we would see our wayward children return. I remember weeping as I listened to his remarks. I prayed that his promise would be fulfilled.

Then, in 1998, our youngest child accidentally drowned. Ben was devastated; we all were. A month later, Ben phoned me and asked if I was sitting down. He announced that he had decided to go on a mission. I was speechless. He said that he had become so despondent over his brother’s death that the only thing left to do was to pray. He told me that he had prayed all night and into the morning. Then he heard a voice as clear as a bell tell him to put his life in order and go on a mission. He moved home a few days later and began the repentance process to prepare to serve. At age twenty-two, he left for his field of service. Today he is married in the temple, has two beautiful children, and has graduated with a degree in business from BYU–Idaho.

Our second child, “Paul,” abandoned the Church in his junior year in high school when he started hanging around with a bad group of friends. This was uncharacteristic of Paul. He was the peacemaker in our home. He was always a sensitive and spiritual boy. Whenever my husband would give Paul a blessing, he would burst into tears. There was just something about him. But when he began to make poor choices of friends, he went from being an honor student to dropping out midway through that year.

I watched with despair as he became more and more involved with drugs. He was arrested repeatedly, and went through the juvenile system. Most of the time the punishment was light, and he always bluffed his way through the drug counseling. Within the year, he moved out of our home and we rarely heard from him. Often, we had no idea where he was.

After Paul turned 18, he continued on his downward spiral. We prayed and prayed for him, and I fasted almost every Sunday. I recalled Elder Holland’s promise, and I tried to be faithful in every way. Nevertheless, I found it hard not to question myself. I would constantly wonder what I had or had not done that had caused Paul to go down this path, but I never found any answers. Still, I beat myself up ruthlessly.

Paul finally reached a low point when he was sent to prison for an evaluation before sentencing. He spent three months in prison, twenty-three hours a day in a cell, and we could only have contact with him through letters. Over the course of those weeks, I noticed the tone of his letters change. He wrote and asked us to send him a set of scriptures. He read them from cover to cover. Soon, he was bearing his testimony in his letters. It was an amazing transformation.

But his journey wasn’t over. Next, he was sentenced to complete inpatient drug rehab, and he spent several months in the county jail waiting for a space to open up for him. While in jail, he attended the Church-sponsored meetings and he grew very close to the men and women who served there. He was finally admitted to the Salvation Army inpatient program, and he worked very hard to complete it.

When he was released, he did well for a few weeks, but then relapsed. Angry with himself for failing, he checked himself back into the program and worked even harder. He completely changed his life; he moved away from his old friends and started attending a singles’ ward. There, he met a wonderful young woman, and they were married in the temple a little over a year ago. He continues to be involved with the LDS substance abuse program, and is often a facilitator at the meetings. He works with the young men in his ward, and has one of the strongest testimonies I’ve ever heard.

As a parent, I have felt guilt, inadequacy, and failure during those days. So many times I felt that the Lord dealt me a bad hand and I wasn’t up to the task. My husband and I counseled with our bishop many times, and even today I still question my parenting skills, but I never gave up and I will never give up. I continue to fast and pray for my children, and I know that miracles happen.

When Paul was in jail he wrote a touching poem. I think his sentiments might give hope to all parents who struggle with their wayward children.

The Person I Used to Be

As I sit in this cell

And I think about God

I see it’s not really hell,

I’ve been brought back to the Rod.

So I’ll hold on tight

Because falling away

Means not doing right

Like I did in those days.

When my will was important

And I did what I did,

It was from God’s intent

For me that I hid.

But I’ve opened my eyes

Small miracles came

Now I see through the lies

And I take full blame.

Now I may have fooled others

And myself I’ve betrayed

And all that I have learned

Is that I should have stayed.

It’s Going to Be All Right

The purpose of this article could be boiled down to this one statement: It’s going to be all right. The Lord had provided a spiritual solution for waywardness. We are not impotent; we can pray for opportunities for our children to change. We have (or can develop) all the necessary tools to partner with heaven in bringing our children to a crossroads or in petitioning for a “conversion opportunity,” as did Alma the Elder. As we apply these tools and patiently work with our wayward children, we must maintain our perspective of where and when they are living.

This world is possibly the most corrupt among God’s creations, and our children are living in the most wicked phase of its existence. Agency and truth are choked by such vile conditions, and God will mercifully take this into account. President J. Reuben Clark Jr. said, “I believe that in his justice and mercy, [God] will give us the maximum reward for our acts, give us all that he can give, and in the reverse, I believe that he will impose upon us the minimum penalty which it is possible for him to impose.”[v]

We must remember that our children were among the noble and great ones whose fall rendered them exceptionally disempowered: physically, spiritually, and emotionally. They are asleep as to their true identity and to things “as they really are.”[vi] Nevertheless, in His wisdom, God foresaw these conditions, and with the redemption of all His children in mind, He created a plan to organize families into saving relationships, where strong parents nurture spiritually weak children, and strong children bless spiritually weak parents.

We parents were prepared for our mortal redemptive missions. Despite our temporary amnesia, we carry within us vital instruction and skill to become saviors on Mount Zion to our children. As we perform our missions, we will develop essential godlike characteristics that will propel us into the celestial kingdom.

Central to our being able to hone the invaluable skills of working redemption among God’s children, we will be introduced to “the heart of the gospel message,” which Jesus described in the parables of the lost sheep, the lost coin, and the prodigal son. We will observe firsthand the Savior’s ability to rescue those who have wandered, who have become lost from view, or who have rebelled and traveled to a “far country” to live like the Gentiles. We will be invited to follow His example. We will also observe the work and glory of God as He sets His hand to reclaim His wayward children. In the process we will recognize angelic ministrations as the powers of heaven are loosed to answer our prayers in behalf of our children and to assist us in our mission.

To ground us in faith and to provide us with strength to persevere when all might seem lost, we can rely on the many prophetic promises that assure us of a positive outcome. Central to these promises is our obligation to sanctify ourselves and to offer service in the temple that blessings might more easily flow from heaven.

Parents and spouses can have confidence and power to gather in the name of Jesus Christ as we call on the powers of the priesthood—the powers to bind our children to us, to turn their hearts to us, and to claim them forever through the eternal weld that is represented by our sealing.

In the end, we know that the worth of our child’s soul is great in the sight of God. Our Heavenly Father anticipated and prepared for the difficult situation that we are now facing. He sent his Son, Jesus Christ, to rescue the child through the power of the infinite and eternal Atonement. The work of the Father and the Son is fully adequate to snatch our children from the deepest abyss, break down every obstacle, and place them on a throne.

Let us, therefore, ascribe to our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ the perfections of character They are due: mercy, love, power, knowledge, compassion, grace, truth, and so forth. When we attempt to impose upon Them constraints of time or imagine that a difficulty is beyond Their reach, we discount the testimony of prophets, who have said nothing is too hard for the Lord.[vii] Therefore, we should be careful when we pass immutable judgments on wayward souls, even when they sin grossly or remain unrepentant even until death. A veritable tome of evidence testifies that, with the help of the Lord, parents can be equipped with immeasurable ability and resources to rescue their wayward children from any location, time, or situation. Clearly, our covenants take on an added dimension when viewed in this light, for great power is given to those of us who sincerely make and keep covenants.

As we sanctify ourselves in the covenant, we reach out to Jesus, who extends “the arm of mercy towards them that put their trust in him.”[viii] We become one with Him in every way and thus have access to His saving power. No statement of understanding could be more comforting as we persist in the work of redemption.

You Are Not Alone

We end with President Monson’s counsel on gaining peace over the care of our families. He shared these sentiments with faithful members in leadership positions, but considering the broader context of the prophets’ promises regarding all worthy parents who are sanctifying themselves and serving the Lord, these words clearly apply to all of us:

“You are not alone,” President Monson promised. “We pray for you.” He goes on to remind us of a scripture from the Doctrine and Covenants: ‘Verily, thus saith the Lord unto you . . . your families are well; they are in mine hands, and I will do with them as seemeth me good; for in me there is all power.’”[ix]

May we always have faith in the Lord’s power to work in and through us. May we always remember the love He has for each of us. And may we never forget that with God all things are possible.

Author’s Note:

Note: This article is adapted from Rescuing Wayward Children. Follow this link to learn more.

Also, to receive a sample of my new 5-book series, The Three Pillars of Zion, Click here.

[ii] See Ezra Taft Benson, “In His Steps,” Ensign, September 1988.

[iii] Robert L. Millet, When a Child Wanders, 120–122.

[iv] Robert L. Millet, When a Child Wanders, 126–127.

[v] J. Reuben Clark, Jr., Conference Report, October 1953, 84.

[vi] Jacob 4:13.

[vii] See Genesis 18:14.

[viii] Mosiah 29:20.

[ix] Thomas S. Monson, “News of the Church” Ensign, September 1994, 76.

It is a well-known fact that the sacrament serves to align our lives with Jesus Christ like a compass aligns us to true north. When we are faced with a child who is off course, a most useful, redeeming tool for parents is to remain on course. According to numerous parents who have suffered long with a wayward child, the sacrament was the single gospel principle upon which they relied to weekly anchor them to their covenants and to infuse them with power to press forward in faith and hope.

The Purposes of the Sacrament

The ordinances of the sacrament and baptism are interconnected. Baptism is the covenant of salvation;[i] Jesus Christ is the agent of salvation. When we renew our baptismal covenants by partaking of the sacrament, we should recommit to the terms of baptism that ensure our salvation, and we should recommit our lives to Jesus Christ. The major purpose of our gathering in sacrament meeting is to partake of the sacrament. “When ye come together therefore into one place, is it not to eat the Lord’s supper?”[ii] The Apostle Paul suggests three great purposes for the sacrament.

• The sacrament is a memorial. “This do ye . . . in remembrance of me.”[iii]
• The sacrament is a testimonial. When we partake, we “shew the Lord’s death till he come.”[iv] (Note that the word shew means to “proclaim or announce.”)
• The sacrament is an examination. “But let a man examine himself.”[v]

When we partake of the sacrament, do we fulfill these three main purposes? Do we rejoice in our recollection of the wonder and majesty of the Atonement? Does our partaking of the sacrament testify of our faith in the Redeemer? Do we look closely at our lives to see if we are worthy and if we are conducting ourselves as disciples ought? Again, many parents of wayward children have testified that the sacrament, because it focuses on our relationship with Jesus Christ, brought them comfort, purpose, hope, and the power to face their challenges and to obtain divine assistance for their children.

The Sacrament and the Promise of the Holy Ghost

Nothing in the process of redeeming a wayward child is as essential as having the guidance of the Holy Ghost. Significantly, the sacrament’s sanctifying promise is the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost: “Those who partake of the sacrament place themselves under covenant with the Lord to take upon them the name of Christ, to always remember him, and to keep his commandments. The Lord in turn covenants that they may always have his Spirit to be with them.”[vi]

This implication is often missed. When we are baptized and confirmed, we are commanded to “receive the Holy Ghost.” Elder Bruce R. McConkie points out that this commandment is also a gift—a right, not a guarantee, “based on faithfulness, to the constant companionship of the member of the Godhead. It is the right to receive revelation, guidance, light, and truth.”[vii] Our ability to retain the companionship of the Holy Ghost is apparently dependent upon our honoring our baptismal covenants by means of the sacrament. In plain terms, the sacrament is the ordinance that makes retention of the Holy Ghost possible.

The Holy Ghost and Sanctification

Elder Dallin H. Oaks said, “When we worthily partake of the sacrament, we are promised that we will ‘always have his Spirit to be with [us].’ To qualify for that promise we covenant that we will ‘always remember him’ (D&C 20:77).”[viii] Because we enjoy the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost, we enjoy the constant sanctifying power of that gift, which sanctification, in addition to all other considerations, enables us to seek redeeming blessings for those whom we love.

The Holy Ghost is the Sanctifier. Receipt of the Holy Ghost is called the baptism of fire, which follows the baptism by water. We are immersed both in water and in the Spirit. Remission of sins is not possible without the baptism of fire. Of the necessity of these two baptisms, the Prophet Joseph Smith said, “You might as well baptize a bag of sand as a man, if not done in view of the remission of sins and getting of the Holy Ghost. Baptism by water is but half a baptism, and is good for nothing without the other half—that is, the baptism of the Holy Ghost.”[ix] Because “no unclean thing can dwell in a divine presence,” and because “people are saved to the extent that they are sanctified,”[x] we cherish and rely on the Holy Ghost, who burns out of us all impurities and creates of us a “new creature.”[xi]

As its name implies, baptism by fire is hot. Malachi described the work of the Lord and his agent, the Holy Ghost, as a refiner’s fire.[xii] Both the Savior and the Holy Ghost are engaged in the work of refining souls. This knowledge is important to parents of wayward children and speaks to the theme of my book: The redeemed become the redeemers.

Our ability to rescue and redeem a wayward soul is directly linked to our level of sanctification. Therefore, we are told that before we attempt to pluck out the mote in another’s eye we must first excise the beam from our own.[xiii] That process requires the Holy Ghost. As we pray for the Lord’s help to rescue our children, we might be surprised that He focuses His attention on us first. The Lord might use the child’s situation to sanctify us. If we will submit to the refiner’s fire, once we emerge from it, we will be in a much better position to help our children when they experience it.

Elder Bruce R. McConkie wrote of the sacramental covenant and the Holy Ghost as paths to redemption:

Those who partake of the sacrament worthily thereby put themselves under covenant with the Lord: 1. To always remember the broken body and spilled blood of Him who was crucified for the sins of the world; 2. To take upon themselves the name of Christ and always remember him; and 3. To keep the commandments of God, that is, to “live by every word that proceedeth forth from the mouth of God.” (D&C 84:44.)

As his part of the contract, the Lord covenants: 1. That such worthy saints shall have his Spirit to be with them; and 2. That in due course they shall inherit eternal life. (D&C 20:75–79; Moro. 4; 5.) “Whoso eateth my flesh, and drinketh my blood, hath eternal life; and I will raise him up at the last day.” (John 6:54.) In the light of these covenants, promises, and blessings, is it any wonder that the Lord commanded: “It is expedient that the church meet together often to partake of bread and wine in the remembrance of the Lord Jesus.” (D&C 20:75; Doctrines of Salvation, Volume 2, 338–350.)”[xiv]

Clearly, none of these blessings are possible without the sacrament.

Coming to the Altar of Sacrifice

Each Sunday our attention should be focused on the sacramental table—the altar of sacrifice—where the priests of God prepare emblems of bread and water that remind us of the Lord’s sacrifice. Jesus said that He is the Bread of Life[xv] and the Living Water.[xvi]

In the sacramental covenant, both parties make promises to and agree to sacrifice for each other. The Lord’s promises are the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost and eternal life; our promises are those that we made at baptism, specifically, to take upon us the name of Christ, to always remember Him, and to keep His commandments. Jesus’ sacrifice is His body and His blood; our sacrifice is a “broken heart and a contrite spirit.”[xvii] The altar is where all of this takes place.

At the altar of sacrifice, the priests of God prepare and consecrate the sacrifice and set forth the terms of the covenant. The sacrament, like the Passover, is the memorial of our salvation and deliverance. That single hope should sink deeply within our souls as we consider the Atonement’s saving and liberating implications for our children.

The Supernal Blessing of the Holy Ghost

By living in a way that we always honor our baptismal covenants, we “retain a remission of our sins,”[xviii] “and the remission of sins bringeth meekness, and lowliness of heart; and because of meekness and lowliness of heart cometh the visitation of the Holy Ghost, which Comforter filleth with hope and perfect love, which love endureth by diligence unto prayer, until the end shall come, when all the saints shall dwell with God.”[xix] The promise of the Holy Ghost is unequalled: “The Holy Ghost shall be thy constant companion, and thy scepter an unchanging scepter of righteousness and truth; and thy dominion shall be an everlasting dominion, and without compulsory means it shall flow unto thee forever and ever.”[xx]

Therefore—and in no other way—by the simple, sanctifying act of worthily partaking of the sacrament, we renew our baptismal covenant and secure the promise that we received in our confirmation: the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost. And we know that it is the Holy Ghost who sanctifies us, which sanctification fills us with power to rescue our wayward children.

Author’s Note

Note: This article is adapted from Rescuing Wayward Children. Follow this link to learn more.

Also, to receive a sample of my new 5-book series, The Three Pillars of Zion, Click here.

[ii] JST 1 Corinthians 11:20.

[iii] 1 Corinthians 11:25.

[iv] 1 Corinthians 11:26.

[v] 1 Corinthians 11:28.

[vi] Encyclopedia of Mormonism, “Sacrament,” 1243–1244.

[vii] Bruce R. McConkie, “Gift of the Holy Ghost,” Mormon Doctrine, 312.

[viii] Dallin H. Oaks, “Pornography,” Ensign, May 2005, 88.

[ix] Robert, B.H., History of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Volume 5, 499.

[x] Encyclopedia of Mormonism, “Holy Ghost,” 649–650.

[xi] 2 Corinthians 5:17.

[xii] See Malachi 3:2.

[xiii] See Matthew 7:3–4.

[xiv] Bruce R. McConkie, “Sacrament,” Mormon Doctrine, 660.

[xv] See John 6:35.

[xvi] See John 4:10.

[xvii] D&C 59:8.

[xviii] Mosiah 4:12.

[xix] Moroni 8:26, emphasis added.

[xx] D&C 121:46.

For single parents and those wishing to be sealed in the temple, this can be a painful reminder. However, though this article deals specifically with the power given to married couples who are sealed in the temple, many principles apply to singles, single parents, those working for eternal union with less-active spouses, and to children who are praying for their wayward parents. Faith and grace allow us to act as if we were in possession of that which we lack and to do all that we can do with the assurance that the Lord will make up the difference.  Attesting to the truth of this comforting fact, President Spencer W. Kimball said all faithful members would “not be deprived of any blessings which they might have received if they had lived up to all of the commandments with which they could comply.”

The Power of the Marriage Sealing

Love between a husband and a wife can be welded into an unbreakable link by the temple marriage covenant. If a couple lives true to that covenant, they can become one in word, purpose, and deed. That quality of oneness is the ultimate unity necessary to obtain redemptive blessings in behalf of our children. While the temple experience teaches us that the sealing of parents is initially provisional and based on subsequent obedience, we also are aware that no such qualifying language is used when a child is born in the covenant or when a child is later sealed to his parents. This fact suggests that the Lord intends for the child to belong to the parents forever.

President Joseph Fielding Smith said,

Those born under the covenant, throughout all eternity, are the children of their parents. Nothing except the unpardonable sin, or sin unto death, can break this tie. If children do not sin as John said, ‘unto death,’ the parents may still feel after them and eventually bring them back near to them again.

The prophets have stated repeatedly that the calling of parent is one from which we are never released. Such is the incredible power of the sealing ordinance. The covenant entered into and the sealing pronounced on a couple married in the temple create a patriarchal hold that secures children to their parents forever. The sealing of children to parents gives children the inalienable right to be offered all the blessings of the new and everlasting covenant. Moreover, the sealing has the power to draw children toward those blessings.

Sealed by the Holy Spirit of Promise

The ultimate goals of love should be to enter into the new and everlasting covenant of marriage, then persist in that covenant until the marriage is sealed by the Holy Spirit of Promise. The Holy Spirit of Promise is a “name-title used in connection with the sealing and ratifying power of the Holy Ghost.” Great power devolves upon a husband and wife who have married in the temple and lived worthily so that the Holy Spirit of Promise can validate their marriage. Elder Bruce C. Hafen wrote,

A covenant marriage in the highest sense will begin as a temple marriage. When the partners are then sufficiently righteous, the marriage will be sealed by the Holy Spirit of Promise (D&C 132:7), “which the Father sheds forth upon all those who are just and true” (D&C 76:53). Such a marriage will then be not only eternal in duration but also celestial in quality, for it will be a marriage that partakes of God’s quality of life.

President James E. Faust made one of the clearest statements on the subject: “When the covenant of marriage for time and eternity, the culminating gospel ordinance, is sealed by the Holy Spirit of promise, it can literally open the windows of heaven for great blessings to flow to a married couple who seek for those blessings.”

The sealing of the Holy Spirit of Promise is contingent upon our faithfulness to our covenants. Although marriage is an important step toward exaltation, it is not the ultimate step. Elder Bruce R. McConkie wrote, “It should be clearly understood that these high blessings are not part of celestial marriage. ‘Blessings pronounced upon couples in connection with celestial marriage are conditioned upon the subsequent faithfulness of the participating parties.’” In the final analysis, for marriage (or any saving ordinance) to have the greatest power, it must be sealed by the Holy Spirit of Promise.

Great Powers Unleashed

If a man and a woman marry in the temple, thereby entering into the patriarchal order of the priesthood, and then remain worthy so that their marriage is sealed by the Holy Spirit of Promise, they are given greater power from on high to ask for and receive the highest blessings. These blessings include power to gather or call back their family to Christ (keys restored by Moses), power to organize their family into an eternal, celestial unit, including power to ensure that each family member receives all the blessings of the new and everlasting covenant (keys restored by Elias), and power to have all those blessings sealed so that these blessings might endure forever (keys restored by Elijah).

Speaking of the great blessings that flow to the children by the power of their parents’ marriage sealing, Joseph Fielding Smith wrote:

These keys hold the power to seal husbands and wives for eternity as well as for time. They hold the power to seal children to parents, the key of adoption, by which the family organization is made intact forever. This is the power which will save the obedient from the curse in the coming of the great and dreadful day of the Lord. Through these keys the hearts of the children have turned to their fathers.

So the key to rescuing our wayward children lies not only in our striving to be unified, but to be unified with respect to our covenants. Elder Russell M. Nelson wrote: “As you obey each of God’s commandments, your holiness will fortify the foundation of your fathers’ faith. When the two of you are together spiritually, one plus one is clearly greater than two.”

An Example

Following is a story of a Nevada couple who followed this advice.

When “James” was a teenager, he set about to self-destruct in record time. “Thomas and Alyssa,” his parents, were helpless to halt or alter his determination. A bad group of friends introduced him to alcohol and later, tobacco. When he began to fail badly in school, Thomas and Alyssa tried to help him with a tutor, but James soon lost all interest. Later, he dropped out of school, and later still, when Thomas and Alyssa had laid out a simple set of rules that James would not abide, they asked him to live elsewhere. By that time, he was using and selling drugs, stealing from his parents, and having frequent run-ins with the law. At one point, James was incarcerated for a year, but when he was released he continued with his destructive behavior.

To deal with the problem, Thomas and Alyssa did something remarkable: they pulled together as a couple. They renewed their marriage by frequent dating and trips. They increased their temple attendance, and they put more energy into their couple prayers. In the midst of one of the worst trials of their lives, they reacted by loving each other and God more.

Throughout these years of intense stress and heartbreak, Thomas and Alyssa kept in contact with James and assured him of their love for him. Thomas said, “Alyssa and I didn’t know what else to do. In the beginning, we prayed because that was all we could think to do. But over time, we discovered that parental prayer is a sort of right God gives fathers and mothers. We didn’t even know that we had such a right until we noticed our prayers being answered in miraculous ways.”

At one critical moment, James had moved to a new city and had no place to room. His parents knew that his decision would make or break him. His history had been to live with the low-lifes of society-jobless and hard partying, alcoholics and drug users. Now he was faced with a similar decision, and Thomas and Alyssa went to their knees. They pled with Heavenly Father to help James find an LDS person to live with. Within the week, James called and said that he had made a friend of a returned missionary who had invited him to be his roommate. James stayed with this young man until his next crisis.

Later, James called his father and announced that he and a woman with whom he had been having an affair, were going to buy a condo so they could live together. Despite Thomas’s stern counsel discouraging this, James had stubbornly made up his mind and once again announced that he was going to do things his way. Thomas and Alyssa went to their knees and prayed that something would happen to give James another choice.

Within the week, James called to tell his parents that the woman had broken up with him. He was hurt, but he had begun to date an LDS girl. Within a short period of time, James and the girl fell in love and wanted to get married. She had set her sites on a temple marriage, and that made James reconsider his life. He asked his father to give him a blessing. James went to his bishop, confessed, and gave up all his bad habits. The young woman was willing to wait for James as he completed the repentance process, and after a year, they were married in the temple. Of this miracle, Thomas and Alyssa said, “Couples may not know the power that God puts into their hands. A couple that has truly become one can sincerely pray for their children, and miracles will happen. That oneness calls forth a power we had never thought possible.

Without the Sealing, All would be “Wasted”

Thus, although love may motivate a man and woman to enter into marriage, only God has the power to truly make them one. Moroni revealed to Joseph Smith the sobering fact why this welding link-a temple sealing and subsequent sanctification-must be in place to make a couple (and their progenitors and children) one: so that “the whole earth [would not] be utterly wasted at [the Lord's] coming.” Robert L. Millet gives us further insight into this idea of the earth’s being wasted:

Why would the earth be wasted at his coming? Because the earth would not have accomplished its foreordained purpose of establishing on its face a family system patterned after the order of heaven. If there were no sealing powers whereby families could be bound together, then the earth would never “answer the end of its creation” (D&C 49:16). It would be wasted and cursed, for all men and women would be forever without root or branch, without ancestry or posterity.

With the merciful gift and commandment of having our marriages start at temple altars, righteous parents are made one by God and sealed together with His unbreakable welding link. Then, as we faithfully persevere in our covenants, the Holy Spirit of Promise seals our marriages more surely so that the welding link that was set in place at the altar will never fail.

The children who issue forth from this union-or who are sealed into it-are surely secured to us by virtue of that same, sure weld. Despite their rebellion, they cannot break free. The power of their parents’ oneness, which was set in place by God and made sure by the Holy Spirit of Promise, has the power to hold onto the children and eventually reel them back.

Author’s Note

Note: This article is adapted from Rescuing Wayward Children. Follow this link to learn more.

Also, to receive a sample of my new 5-book series, The Three Pillars of Zion, Click here.

See Bruce R. McConkie, “Celestial Marriage,” Mormon Doctrine, 117-18.

Joseph Fielding Smith, Doctrines of Salvation, volume 2, 90.

See M. Russell Ballard, “Let Our Voices be Heard,” Ensign, November 2003.

D&C 131:2.

Bruce R. McConkie, Mormon Doctrine, “Holy Spirit of Promise,” 361.

Bruce C. Hafen, Covenant Hearts, 77.

James E. Faust, “The Gift of the Holy Ghost-A Sure Compass,” Ensign, April 1996, emphasis added.

Joseph Fielding Smith, quoted in Bruce R. McConkie’s Mormon Doctrine, “Calling and Election Sure,” 110.

D&C 131:1-4; 132:28-30.

D&C 132:7, 19, 26; See also D&C 76:53.

See D&C 110.

Joseph Fielding Smith, Doctrines of Salvation, Volume 2, 119, emphasis added.

Russell M. Nelson, The Power within Us, 113.

D&C 2:3, comments added.

Robert L. Millet, When a Child Wanders, 100-101.

H. Wallace Goddard observed that charity has three meanings: Love from Christ, Love for Christ, Love like Christ. The process of loving begins when we feel Jesus reaching after us (Love from Christ).

Somewhere along the path the miracle of His love breaks down our resistance. As we begin to understand His goodness and redemptiveness, we are changed. We are filled with a profound awe and gratitude for Him. We experience the stirrings of hope. Without this conversion, we are nothing spiritually (1 Cor. 13:2; 2 Ne. 26:30; Moro. 7:44, 46; D&C 18:19). As the amazing truth of His unrelenting love pierces our hearts, we are led to the second kind of charity, love for Christ. “We love him, because he first loved us” (1 Jn. 1:19). . . . As soon as we glimpse His love for us we instinctively love Him in return. We fall at His feet and bathe them with tears of gratitude. Why would He do all He has done to love and rescue my flawed soul? Why??? The answer is charity. As we feel the love from Him and for Him, we naturally love like Him. We become saviors on Mount Zion with Him.

True Love in Marriage and Family

Interestingly, a temple marriage-especially one that is built upon the foundation of charity-is called a saving ordinance. Temple marriage saves a man and woman. Marriage is one of the greatest evidences of God’s salvation. In an act of unequalled charity, He snatches two individuals from their fallen condition, introduces them to each other as his beloved son and daughter, and invites them to experience His exalted meaning of love and thus partake of the fullness of His glory. Through marriage God saves the couple, they save each other, and others are saved in the process. Amazingly, by means of the couple’s saving marriage, their progenitors now experience a higher manifestation of salvation, for “they without us cannot be made perfect.”

Likewise, future generations are saved by the couple’s marriage. As children are born into this union, they are saved by the love and the covenants of their parents. Therefore, by the couple’s entering into the saving relationship of marriage, the children become the focal point of eternity for untold generations past and future.

“The Family: A Proclamation to the World” states that husbands and wives, by virtue of their marriage vows, have a solemn obligation to love and care for one another. As couples continue to court and care for one another, they ensure their love will never die. Likewise, to keep their love vibrant, husbands and wives might try applying two keys of courting: anticipate the needs of their companion, then surprise and delight with constant acts of love. It has been said that children can receive no greater gift than being reared by parents who love each other.

Surely there can be nothing greater than the love that Heavenly Father has for our Heavenly Mother. A husband wrote about his contemplation of this idea and how it helped him to be a better partner:

After three and a half decades of marriage, I was one day distressed by the realization that, as much as I loved my wife, my level of love for her paled in comparison to the love that Heavenly Father has for His wife. His love is perfect love; mine is not. Therefore, I realized that I had a ways to go. Because charity is a spiritual gift, I began to pray that I could learn to love my wife as Heavenly Father loves his wife. Every time I prayed, I received the same answer, Do more for your wife. Love, I learned, is a feeling that has expression and grows by loving actions. If I wanted to love more, I needed to do more, and I needed to do all this for no selfish expectation, and only for the pure purpose of expressing love. Whereas worldly love often diminishes with time, charitable love increases until it becomes perfect and becomes like the love shared by our Heavenly Parents. Do I love my wife more now than when we married in 1972? Much more. Why? Because over the years we have shared so many loving experiences. My love for her is not perfect, but I am determined that it will be, and that is sure to be a wonderful journey.

To Love First

How does love grow? It grows as we love someone first. “Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us . . . We love him, because he first loved us.” We love first, and then love is returned. As we discussed in chapter seven, it is an oft-repeated scriptural formula that has many applications: “Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy.”

Elder Boyd K. Packer said it this way: “As you give what you have, there is a replacement, with increase!” Love is returned by someone’s loving first; love increases by being loving; love cleaveth unto love like “light cleaveth unto light.” This love, a saving love, is charity, which never faileth. John Greenleaf Whittier wrote, “I’ll lift you, and you lift me, and we’ll both ascend together.” Of course, loving first is fraught with risk. Love shown might not be returned immediately. Sometimes it may seem like it will never come.

Elder Maxwell explained that parents often extend love that is not reciprocated. He quoted Edith Hamilton as saying, ‘”When love meets no return the result is suffering and the greater the love the greater the suffering. There can be no greater suffering than to love purely and perfectly one who is bent upon evil and self-destruction. That was what God endured at the hands of men’ (Spokesman for God, 1936, 112).” Elder Maxwell explained that the pain that we feel provides us an appreciation for the Savior, which appreciation we might not otherwise gain.

Nevertheless, love we must, for only love unfeigned has the power to rescue a wayward soul. If we want to love our wayward children back, we must start by better loving God and our spouse, which increases our capacity to love. Then we are in a position to better love the “unlovable” child. Often, we will need to show love for the child before he shows love to us, and we must persist in that love until love breaks down every barrier between us, melts the child’s heart, embraces him in an unbreakable bond, and finally leads him home. Professor Rex A. Skidmore has said, “Parents need to remember that a youth is never so much in need of understanding as when he is non-approachable and never so much in need of love as when he is unlovable.”

Love Perfected

Being loving to our spouse is not only an expansive principle, it is a perfecting one that draws God near. “If we love one another, God dwelleth in us, and his love is perfected in us.” Moreover, by loving acts we are endowed with an added measure of the Holy Ghost: “Hereby know we that we dwell in him, and he in us, because he hath given us of his Spirit.” As we abide in this cycle of loving and receiving love, our love eventually becomes perfect: “God is love; and he that dwelleth in love dwelleth in God, and God in him. Herein is our love made perfect.”

Significantly, the only other person besides God whom a man is commanded to love with all his heart is his wife: “Thou shalt love thy wife with all thy heart, and shalt cleave unto her and none else.” Our model is Christ, who frequently refers to Himself as the Bridegroom, and we, being part of His church, are symbolically His bride. In Hosea, He is the forgiving, compassionate, nurturing Husband, and elsewhere He is the Good Shepherd, who gives His life for those whom He loves.

This quality of love is that which yokes us to Him, an important principle considering the fact that He, by covenant, is an important third partner in our marriage; He is as essential to us as we are to each other. Our marriage simply cannot be sanctified, and we cannot grow in the principle of love, without Him. In the case where we are in a struggling marriage where our spouse does not seem willing to work with us in increasing love, or where a spouse does not believe in gospel principles, we still may rely on the amazing power of love-freely given by us-to powerfully affect the relationship and us individually. This is one reason why we do not need to fear one-sided love.

No Fear in Love

Perhaps one of the greatest benefits of loving is ceasing to be afraid: “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear.” If our circumstance is causing us fear, we might consider reexamining the foundation upon which our love is built, “because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.” We must regroup by being loving, and love will be returned with increase. As love grows, we will feel our level of fear decrease. This love is the love of God, giving us peace and ameliorating the risks of unreturned mortal love.

Love-The Greatest Power

Love–perfect love–is the greatest power in the universe. Love motivates God to do all that He does. The greatest expression of His love is to give and redeem life. He invites His children to experience His type of life, for therein is His joy made full. By following His example-giving life and redeeming life-our joy is also made full. Therein is the perfection of and hope for our love. Therein are children given and therein are children saved.

Author’s Note

This article was adapted from my book, Rescuing Wayward Children. Follow this link to learn more.)

Also, get a sample of my new 5-book series on Zion: The Three Pillars of Zion. Click here.

Note: Although this article speaks of the power available in the marriage sealing, many principles apply to singles, single parents, those working for eternal union with less-active spouses, and to children who are praying for their wayward parents. Faith and grace allow us to act as if we were in possession of that which we lack. The Lord assures us that when we do all we can do, He will make up the difference.

H. Wallace Goddard, Drawing Heaven into Your Marriage, 111.

See Bruce R. McConkie, Mormon Doctrine, “Celestial Marriage,” 117-118.

D&C 128:15.

See “The Family: A Proclamation to the World.“

1 John 4:10, 19.

Matthew 5:7.

Boyd K. Packer, “The Candle of the Lord,” Ensign, January 1983.

D&C 88:40.

Edith Hamilton quoted, also Elder Maxwell, in Neal A. Maxwell’s “Enduring Well,” Ensign, April 1997.

Rex A. Skidmore, “What Part Should the Teen-ager Play in the Family?” Improvement Era, January 1952.

1 John 4:12.

1 John 4:13.

1 John 4:16-17.

D&C 42:22.

See Matthew 9:15.

See Isaiah 62:5.

See John 10:11.

1 John 4:18.

See 3 Nephi 17:20.

See Alma 26:11.

In preparing Helaman to succeed him, Alma bade his son to remember that the gospel was designed to unleash grand heavenly powers by small and simple means. A case in point, he said, was the Liahona: “And it did work for [Lehi's family] according to their faith in God….because those miracles were worked by small means it did show unto them marvelous works.” Then Alma stated the principle:

For behold, it is as easy to give heed to the word of Christ, which will point to you a straight course to eternal bliss, as it was for our fathers to give heed to this compass, which would point unto them a straight course to the promised land….O my son, do not let us be slothful because of the easiness of the way; for so was it with our fathers; for so was it prepared for them, that if they would look they might live; even so it is with us. The way is prepared, and if we will look we may live forever.

The final mandate that Alma gave to Helaman before he sent him forth to minister to the people was this: “See that ye look to God and live.” It is easy!

The Simpleness of the Way

Alma was not alone in stating that the powers of heaven swing open on simple hinges. Centuries earlier, Nephi chastised his hard-hearted brothers for behaving like the faithless Israelites who complained to God and opposed Moses. Even when they were perishing from snake bites, they would not accept the Lord’s simple solution for life and salvation.

And he did straiten them in the wilderness with his rod; for they hardened their hearts, even as ye have; and the Lord straitened them because of their iniquity. He sent fiery flying serpents among them; and after they were bitten he prepared a way that they might be healed; and the labor which they had to perform was to look; and because of the simpleness of the way, or the easiness of it, there were many who perished.

Sometimes we think it would be so much easier to believe that life could return to a dying situation if we only had an option that equaled our concern. Thus, we seek answers from everyone and every place except from the Savior. It just seems too Sunday School, too simple, too easy.

No, we want a Savior, who dishes out deep doctrines that can only be understood by the spiritually mature – the only ones who can tap into the powers of heaven and call down blessings. But that isn’t how the plan of salvation works. The gospel is so simple and easy that little children are capable of summoning blessings that would astound older generations. Every missionary can attest that investigators often receive unbelievable outpourings of the Spirit from the moment of their first awkward prayer. Moreover, wayward children frequently feel the immediate embrace of a loving Heavenly Father, who, at the instant of their turn homeward, rushes to his prodigal children and escorts them home. It is all so easy!

The Sacrament-An Easy, Powerful Ordinance of Reclamation

Partaking of the sacrament with more purpose is one of those “easy” ways to rescue a wayward child. Worthily partaken of and understood, the sacrament sanctifies us. The sacrament serves to align our lives with Jesus Christ like a compass aligns us to true north and like the Liahona aligned the lives of the Lehites so that they could follow the line leading to the promised land. When we are faced with a child who is off course, a most useful, redeeming tool for parents is to partake of the sacrament so as to remain on course. Dan and Rita, parents of a wayward child, wrote that they could point to the sacrament as the single gospel principle that anchored them weekly to their covenants and infused them with power to press forward in faith and hope.

The ordinances of the sacrament and baptism are interconnected. Baptism is the covenant of salvation; Jesus Christ is the agent of salvation. When we renew our baptismal covenants by partaking of the sacrament, we recommit to the terms of baptism that ensure our salvation, and we recommit our lives to Jesus Christ, who is our Savior. The Apostle Paul suggests three great purposes for the sacrament:

1. The sacrament is a memorial. “This do ye . . . in remembrance of me.”
2. The sacrament is a testimonial. When we partake, we “shew the Lord’s death till he come.” (Note that the word shew means to “proclaim or announce.”)
3. The sacrament is an examination. “But let a man examine himself.”

When we partake of the sacrament, do we fulfill these three main purposes? Do we rejoice in our recollection of the wonder and majesty of the Atonement? Does our partaking of the sacrament testify of our faith in the Redeemer? Do we look closely at our lives to see if we are worthy and if we are conducting ourselves as disciples ought? Many parents who have shared their stories with me have testified that the sacrament, because it focuses on our relationship with Jesus Christ, brought them comfort, purpose, hope, and the power to face their challenges and to obtain divine assistance for their wayward children.

The Sacrament and the Holy Ghost

Nothing in the process of redeeming a wayward child is as essential as having the guidance of the Holy Ghost. The sacrament’s sanctifying promise is the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost: “Those who partake of the sacrament place themselves under covenant with the Lord to take upon them the name of Christ, to always remember him, and to keep his commandments. The Lord in turn covenants that they may always have his Spirit to be with them.”

The sacrament’s unique promise of the ongoing companionship Holy Ghost is often missed or we associate it with baptism or living a good life. Not so. The sacrament is the designated ordinance that provides for the retention of this supernal gift.

When we are baptized and confirmed, we are commanded to “receive the Holy Ghost.” Elder Bruce R. McConkie points out that this commandment is also a right, but not a guarantee. Our ability to retain the companionship of the Holy Ghost is dependent upon our honoring our baptismal covenants and renewing them by means of the sacrament. Again, the sacrament is the ordinance that makes retention of the Holy Ghost possible.

The Sacrament and Sanctification

Elder Dallin H. Oaks said, “When we worthily partake of the sacrament, we are promised that we will ‘always have his Spirit to be with [us].’ To qualify for that promise we covenant that we will ‘always remember him’ (D&C 20:77).” Because we enjoy the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost, we enjoy the constant sanctifying power of that gift, which sanctification, in addition to all other considerations, enables us to seek redeeming blessings for those whom we love.

The Holy Ghost is the Sanctifier. Receipt of the Holy Ghost is called the baptism of fire, which follows the baptism by water. We are immersed both in water and in the Spirit. Remission of sins is not possible without the baptism of fire. Of the necessity of these two baptisms, the Prophet Joseph Smith said, “You might as well baptize a bag of sand as a man, if not done in view of the remission of sins and getting of the Holy Ghost. Baptism by water is but half a baptism, and is good for nothing without the other half-that is, the baptism of the Holy Ghost.” Because “no unclean thing can dwell in a divine presence,” and because “people are saved to the extent that they are sanctified,” we cherish and rely on the Holy Ghost, who burns out of us all impurities and creates of us a “new creature.”

As its name implies, baptism by fire is hot. Malachi described the work of the Lord and his agent, the Holy Ghost, as a refiner’s fire. Both the Savior and the Holy Ghost are engaged in the work of refining souls. This knowledge is important to parents of wayward children and speaks to the theme of my writings on this subject: The redeemed become the redeemers.

Our ability to rescue and redeem a wayward soul is directly linked to our level of sanctification. Therefore, we are told that before we attempt to pluck out the mote in another’s eye we must first excise the beam from our own. That process requires the Holy Ghost. As we pray for the Lord’s help to rescue our children, we might be surprised that He will focus His attention on us first. The Lord might use the child’s situation to first sanctify us. If we will submit to the refiner’s fire, once we emerge from it, we will be in a much better position to help our children when they experience it.

Elder Bruce R. McConkie wrote of the sacramental covenant and the Holy Ghost as paths to redemption:

Those who partake of the sacrament worthily thereby put themselves under covenant with the Lord: 1. To always remember the broken body and spilled blood of Him who was crucified for the sins of the world; 2. To take upon themselves the name of Christ and always remember him; and 3. To keep the commandments of God, that is, to “live by every word that proceedeth forth from the mouth of God.” (D&C 84:44.)

As his part of the contract, the Lord covenants: 1. That such worthy saints shall have his Spirit to be with them; and 2. That in due course they shall inherit eternal life. (D&C 20:75-79; Moro. 4; 5.) “Whoso eateth my flesh, and drinketh my blood, hath eternal life; and I will raise him up at the last day.” (John 6:54.) In the light of these covenants, promises, and blessings, is it any wonder that the Lord commanded: “It is expedient that the church meet together often to partake of bread and wine in the remembrance of the Lord Jesus.” (D&C 20:75; Doctrines of Salvation, Volume 2, 338-350.)

Coming to the Altar of Sacrifice

Each Sunday our attention should be focused on the sacramental table-the altar of sacrifice-where the priests of God prepare emblems of bread and water that remind us of the Lord’s sacrifice. Jesus said that He is the Bread of Life and the Living Water. In the sacramental covenant, both parties sacrifice for and make promises to each other. The Lord’s promise is the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost; our promises are those that we made at baptism, specifically, to take upon us the name of Christ, to always remember Him, and to keep His commandments. His sacrifice is His body and His blood; our sacrifice is a “broken heart and a contrite spirit.” The altar is where all of this takes place.

The priests of God prepare and consecrate the sacrifice and state the terms of the covenant. (Interestingly, in the Old Testament times, the sacrificing of a lamb, which foreshadowed the sacrifice of the Lamb, involved a person coming to the altar, laying his sacrifice upon it, symbolically transferring his sins to the sacrificial lamb by the laying on of hands, and then-after offering a prayer of atonement-the priests would slay the lamb and the person’s sins would die with it.)

Today, the sacrament, like the Passover, is the memorial of our salvation and deliverance. That single hope should sink deeply within our souls as we consider the Atonement’s saving and liberating implications for our children. By living in a way that we always honor our baptismal covenants, we “retain a remission of our sins,” “and the remission of sins bringeth meekness, and lowliness of heart; and because of meekness and lowliness of heart cometh the visitation of the Holy Ghost, which Comforter filleth with hope and perfect love, which love endureth by diligence unto prayer, until the end shall come, when all the saints shall dwell with God.”

The Supernal Gift of the Holy Ghost

The promise of the Holy Ghost is unequalled: “The Holy Ghost shall be thy constant companion, and thy scepter an unchanging scepter of righteousness and truth; and thy dominion shall be an everlasting dominion, and without compulsory means it shall flow unto thee forever and ever.”

Therefore-and in no other way than this easy way-by the simple, sanctifying act of worthily partaking of the sacrament, we renew our baptismal covenant and secure the promise that we received in our confirmation of the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost. The Holy Ghost sanctifies us, which sanctification fills us with power to rescue our wayward children. It is easy to look to God and live!

Author’s Note

This article was adapted from my book, Rescuing Wayward Children. Follow this link to learn more.

Also, get a sample of my new 5-book series on Zion: The Three Pillars of Zion. Click here.

1 Nephi 17:41, emphasis added.

See Bruce R. McConkie, Mormon Doctrine, “Abrahamic Covenant,” 13.

1 Corinthians 11:25.

1 Corinthians 11:26.

1 Corinthians 11:28.

Encyclopedia of Mormonism, “Sacrament,” 1243-1244.

Bruce R. McConkie, “Gift of the Holy Ghost,” Mormon Doctrine, 312.

Dallin H. Oaks, “Pornography,” Ensign, May 2005, 88.

Robert, B.H., History of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Volume 5, 499.

Encyclopedia of Mormonism, “Holy Ghost,” 649-650.

2 Corinthians 5:17.

See Malachi 3:2.

See Matthew 7:3-4.

Bruce R. McConkie, “Sacrament,” Mormon Doctrine, 660.

See John 6:35.

See John 4:10.

D&C 59:8.

See Old Testament Student Manual 301, 164.

Mosiah 4:12.

Moroni 8:26, emphasis added.

D&C 121:46.

Redemption is the work of celestial people; thus it is the work of angels, as Heavenly Father employs them. We receive continual support in our quest to rescue our wayward children. As both Hezekiah and Elisha testified, there are many more which stand to help us than the powers that oppose our children and us. Joseph Smith taught, “The spirits of the just are exalted to a greater and more glorious work; hence they are blessed in their departure to the world of spirits. Enveloped in flaming fire, they are not far from us, and know and understand our thoughts, feelings, and motions, and are often pained therewith.”

Angels are agents of the Holy Ghost and speak and act by his power. That the keys of the ministering of angels have been restored should fill us with hope and faith. By virtue of the powers attendant to the Aaronic Priesthood, parents have the right to ask for angelic help in behalf of their children.

Angelic Ancestors

We all know that sometimes angels are those who now live on this earth, but often, angelic help comes in the form of our ancestors, they who perhaps understand better than we the power of the “welding link” that binds us together through temple ordinances. They enjoy a clearer view of the importance of the children’s and their fathers’ hearts being turned to each other, and the sealing that must be set in place and not allowed to be broken lest “the earth will be smitten with a curse.” The Prophet Joseph revealed,

And now, my dearly beloved brethren and sisters, let me assure you that these are principles in relation to the dead and the living that cannot be lightly passed over, as pertaining to our salvation. For their salvation is necessary and essential to our salvation, as Paul said concerning the fathers-that they without us cannot be made perfect-neither can we without our dead be made perfect.

Heaven and earth are partners in the cosmic work of salvation. Neither can we be made perfect without our fathers (we need their help) nor can they be made perfect without us (we provide them the saving ordinances). When we bless them with saving ordinances, they are suddenly endowed with power to help save our/their children. Elder Boyd K. Packer wrote, “Brother Widtsoe reaffirmed that ‘those who give themselves with all their might and main to this work [genealogical and temple work] receive help from the other side. Whoever seeks to help those on the other side receives help in return in all the affairs of life.’”

In this mutual redemptive effort, the hearts of the children and their fathers are turned to each other, or welded together, and the “promises made to the fathers” are planted “in the hearts of the children.” What promises? The promises of the Abrahamic covenant, which include the promise of salvation and eventual godhood. That is, as the fathers have covenanted to save us, their children, so we have covenanted to save them.

Angels are not Strangers

Our deceased ancestors, therefore, become ministering servants-angels of God-and their redemptive work continues. President Joseph F. Smith said,

When messengers are sent to minister to the inhabitants of this earth, they are not strangers, but from the ranks of our kindred, friends, and fellow-beings and fellow-servants.” Additionally, in his vision of the spirit world, he declared, “I beheld that the faithful elders [including sisters] of this dispensation, when they depart from mortal life, continue their labors in the preaching of the gospel of repentance and redemption, through the sacrifice of the Only Begotten Son of God, among those who are in darkness and under the bondage of sin in the great world of the spirits of the dead.

Of the reality of ministering ancestral angels, a mother from Utah wrote,

One of my most precious experiences occurred when my wayward son had visited me and left me in tears once again. This child is like trying to hug a porcupine! He believes he is doing himself and everyone else a favor when he tells things ‘the way they are.’ That evening, I had been alone at home. Everyone in my support system was unavailable: my husband was away serving in a Church calling, my youngest son was at work, and my parents were out of town. I was completely defenseless when my son began to hurl unkind accusations and angry words. I remember the searing pain and agony I felt in the wake of his tirade. When he stomped out the door, I sank to the floor and sobbed. I felt myself spiraling into despair and loneliness. I thought that I had nowhere to run and nobody to turn to. As I wept uncontrollably, I realized that I wasn’t alone; all I needed to do was talk to my Heavenly Father and ask for comfort.

What occurred then was unexpectedly beautiful and priceless. As I poured out my agony and begged not to be alone, I asked for someone to come be with me and help me through this horrible time. Soon, I began to feel a warmth creep across my body. Immediately to my right, I sensed the presence of a grandfather to whom I had been particularly close in my youth. Then, to my left, I sensed the presence of my husband’s grandmother, whom I had met only twice in our early marriage. She was sympathetic to my plight; she had lived her life without seeing any of her sons active in the Church. As these two family members stayed with me, I felt surrounded by love, peace, and the knowledge that families are connected in this life and the next.

My husband and I have had many experiences with ancestors helping us, but this experience was especially sweet because it came to me in such a difficult moment. It was a vivid reminder that we are never alone. When we need help we will be ministered to by spirits who love us, know us, and want to help us succeed.

Angelic Ministration is Central to the Restored Gospel

To discount the reality of the ministering of angels is to deny one of the supernal blessings of the restored gospel. As Moroni was closing the Book of Mormon, he exhorted us to believe in miracles and in the ministering of angels: “Wherefore, if these things have ceased wo be unto the children of men, for it is because of unbelief, and all is vain.”

At the April 2006 General Conference, President James E. Faust, quoting Joseph F. Smith, confirmed,

In ancient and modern times angels have appeared and given instruction, warnings, and direction, which benefited the people they visited. We do not consciously realize the extent to which ministering angels affect our lives. President Joseph F. Smith said, “In like manner our fathers and mothers, brothers, sisters and friends who have passed away from this earth, having been faithful, and worthy to enjoy these rights and privileges, may have a mission given them to visit their relatives and friends upon the earth again, bringing from the divine Presence messages of love, of warning, or reproof and instruction, to those whom they had learned to love in the flesh.” Many of us feel that we have had this experience. Their ministry has been and is an important part of the gospel.

Assembling the Powers of Earth and Heaven

We must not despair. In working with our wayward children, God will assemble all the powers of heaven and earth to achieve His glorious work. Whether our children have strayed from the path of truth, become lost by following a forbidden path, or consciously rebelled and run away to a far county, their Heavenly Father can find and rescue them. Even when they are so broken that they are no longer recognizable, He will patiently put them back together until they can bring forth good fruit.

No matter their choices and situations, God loves them and is constantly working to save and redeem them. And so are their family and friends that have gone before. We are never alone in the work of redemption.

Author’s Note

Note: This article is adapted from Rescuing Wayward Children. Follow this link to learn more.

Alma P. Burton, ed., Discourses of the Prophet Joseph Smith, 128.

See 2 Nephi 32:3.

See D&C 13:1.

D&C 128:18.

D&C 128:18.

D&C 128:15.

John A. Widstoe, quoted in Boyd K. Packer’s The Holy Temple, 252.

D&C 2:2.

Joseph F. Smith, Gospel Doctrine: Selections from the Sermons and Writings of Joseph F. Smith, 435.

D&C 138:57.

Moroni 7:37.

James E. Faust, “A Royal Priesthood,” Ensign, May 2006, 50, emphasis added.